Aasalamualikum
I have a problem that i've had since school days and it's that I lack confidence,I realise why this is, all my life I've been put down by people including school teachers. Now I'm past all of that I don't let people put me down just get on with life, but I don't know what to do to gain more confidence. I've never been able to speak out cos I feel so stupid half of the time and when it comes to things like presentations I freak out and keep thinking about it all day, I hate them, every time I do try them my hands become sweaty and my voice shaky, other times I just don't do them. I've got a presentation comming up soon and I feel like I can't do it, it's driving me mad, I don't have a choice I've got to do it. I need some advice what can I do, are there any duas???

اللِّهُمَّ إنِّي عَبْدُكَ ، ابْنُ عَبْدِكَ ، ابْنُ أَمَتِكَ ، نَاصِيَتِي بِيَدِكَ ، مَاضِ فِيَّ حُكْمُكَ ، عَدْلٌ فِيَّ قَضَاؤُكَ ، أَسْأَلُكَ بِكُلِّ اسْمٍ هُوَ لَكَ ، سَمَّيْتَ بِهِ نَفْسَكَ ، أَوْ أنْزَلْتَهُ فِي كِتَاَبِكَ ، أَوْ عَلَّمْتَهُ أَحَدًا مِنْ خَلْقِكَ ، أَوِ اسْتَأْثَرْتَ بِهِ فِي عِلْمِ الْغَيْبِ عِنْدَكَ ، أنْ تَجْعَلَ الْقُرْآنَ رَبِيعَ قَلْبِي ، وَ نُورَ صَدْرِي ، وَ جَلاءَ حُزْنِي ، وَ ذَهَابَ هَمِّي

Allahumma inni 'abduka, ibnu 'abdika, ibnu amatika, naasiyati biyadika, maadhin fiyya hukumuka, 'adhlun fiyya qadha'uka asaluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka, sammaita bihi nafsaka, aw an-zaltahu fi kitabika, aw 'allamtahu ahadan min khalqika, awista'tharta bihi fi 'ilmil-ghaibi 'indaka, an taj'alal-Qur'ana Rabbi'a qalbi, wa nura sadri, wa jalaa'a huzni, wa dhahaba hammi

O Allah, I am Your servant, son of Your servant, son of Your maidservant, my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You which You named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the unseen with You, that You make the Qur’an the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release of my anxiety.
[The Prophet (salAllahu alayhi wasalam) said, there is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and says (the above), but Allah will take away his distress and grief, and replace it with joy." He was asked: "O Messenger of Allah, should we learn this?" He said: "Of course; everyone who hears it should learn it]

Although it appears that it is targeted for anxiety. In a recent Khutba the Imam encouraged this dua for most human problems. Especially depression and anxiety.

Assalamu Alaikum wa rahmatullah sis,

I have two that inshaAllah will help you:

1. Allahuma laa shala illa ma jaaltahu sahlan, wa anta tajaal alhazana etha sheta sahlan.

Oh Allah! There is no ease except in that which you have made easy, and You make the difficulty, if You wish easy!

2. Rubee Ishrahlee sadree, wa yassirlee amree, wa ahlul Ukdatan min lisanee, yafkahu qowlee. Surat Taha verses 25 to 28

Oh Lord, expand me my breast, ease my task for me, and remove the impediment from my speech, so that they may understand what I say.

Peace

Wa 'alaykum assalam dear sister,

Read the du'aas above, May Allah remove your difficulties and make your task easy for you. Ameen

I'll give you some practical advice on this matter - regarding the presentation, what you need to do is practice it out loud as many times as you can. Experiment facial expressions, the way you'll keep yourself focused at front of an audience while presenting your work out loud and clearly. Interact with a group of sisters and sieze that opportunity to try and speak confidently. Don't be afraid sis, you need to resolve this problem right here and right now - because the longer you deal with it the harder it may get in the future.

Do the following:
1) Prepare your presentation and what you'll say (you could write up your main points on paper and the summarized points on powerpoint or a large poster)
2) Get enough practice done as I've mentioned previously
3) Make du'aa and trust Allah! Don't find confidence in people's approval, rather find confidence in all of the effort you put in to prepare for this.

You may realize it or not but your presentation will be received in a friendly manner by the audience - remember that everyone feels nervous when they step up on the stage. It's all about the effort you make and the trust you carry.

I sincerely hope you overcome this difficulty Inshaa'Allah.
Take care, Salaam and du'aas

Aasalmualikum
Just wanted to say thanks for your advice and duas you've all sent. It really does help. Thank you.

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/sl.gif)

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/i.gif) This should help

http://www.gawaher.com/index.php?showtopic=125195

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

Assalamu Alaikum Warahamtullahi Wabarakatahu,

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/j.gif) to all those above, great advice.

I think you do have a problem that is common with many people. Standing up before people and presenting something can always try your nerves as said before preparation and being well reversed is the key to making things go smoothly. It would also help that you feel at ease with who you are, when you wish to say something you should go ahead and do so. Even though you may not feel comfortable, with time you will ease into this and being able to say your opinions. We all learn from one another sis and you could have a very valuable point to share, in some way it also kills the purpose of yourself being here when you chose to close yourself off in this way. You cannot gain confidence from the praise or gratitude from others. That itself comes from you, if you are comfortable in your own skin and do not feel that your opinions are stupid you will be fine. You have to see your own worth before you push to achieve it.

I wish you well with your presentation Sister, do let us know how it goes (IMG:style_emoticons/default/i.gif)

Wa Alaikum Mus Salam Warahamtullahi Wabarakatahu

There is a drug that stage performers take for anxiety issues (stage frieght). The drug is called propranolol and it seems to be immensly effective (it's also safe and non-addictive).

Assalamualikum
Its been some time I haven't replied but thought I'd let you know that my presentation went well, all thanks to Allah. Thank you all for your duas and advice.

I used to be the same way, and it has taken years to overcome. However the ONE thing that I did that really made a big difference in my life was this...

Shakespeare has a well known quote in one of his writings it says this..

Above ALL ELSE unto thine OWN HEART be TRUE...

When I took this quote to heart, and made the decision that I simply don't care what happens to me, who leaves me, who hates me, what job I lose, that I was going to be who I am NO MATTER WHAT. Everything began to change. I went thru some really bad times but I emerged one a Believer, two I feel happy with what I have, and I know who my REAL friends are and HOW to pick them...

It boils down to this, don't give a care if people don't like you or not, be who you are and then you will be amazed how many NEW people love you and want to be like you are...