Posted 08 May 2005 - 10:44 PM
Sorry to bother you. I'm sure most of the people in this section have way bigger problems than me, so I don't want to take away attention from the more significant issues.
Basically, the problem I'm having is that I've been having extreme loneliness...for many years. I don't really know what to do because I'm not the type who likes to go out much, and I'm just shy and quiet. Even on the internet, I don't feel comfortable posting much because it exposes myself. Sometimes people are so mean.
So I'm trying to figure out what to do. I just wish I had someone to give me attention and stuff. I wish I had someone who would be there to listen to me, and always be nice to me. It really hurts to have someone neglect me or be mean. Unfortunately, a weakness of mine is that I'm sensitive, but I think I became more sensitive after something bad happened some years ago.
I wish I had at least one nice person to talk to, maybe over e-mail or Messenger. Of course, if I could find someone to marry, then Insha'Allah I would have someone in real life to give me all the attention and affection I wanted. So far, the families we've met aren't interested in me, though.
So I guess that's my story. I just feel lonely and empty and don't know what to do. Even when I focused more on my iman and trying to improve myself, it didn't help much, sad to say.
Posted 09 May 2005 - 12:27 AM
brother, i'm very sorry to hear you feel this way. btw, your problem is no less important than anyone else's. You are not insignificant.
I think marriage would be the best option, but as everything is up to Allah, the opportunity may not come along yet. Try talking to your family. Talking to a cousin can be really comforting at times.
Msn would be a great option as well, and im sure many brothers on the forum would talk to you. I would do it in a heartbeat, but as you are a brother, it wouldnt be very Islamic. this forum would be a great thing for you too.
Inshallah, everything will work out.
Posted 09 May 2005 - 03:37 AM
I'm also a sister so i won't be able to chat with you, insha Allah brothers will soon be knocking at your msn! But i wanted to say that since your loneliness has been going on for years now, obviously the way you're living is not working for you...even when you get married you can't expect your wife to be the sole provider for your happiness, it takes some effort on your part as well. So try to make changes, today is monday, perfect day to start everything fresh this week, you already made a step forward by trying to make a fiend here, surround yourself with positive thinking people and insha Allah it will rub off on you and change your outlook on things...smile...there's so much to be smiling about, change your ways and Allah will help you in your changes. Have hope and don't give up...it will come for you in time. May Allah make your heart happy and bless you with a beautiful loving wife, ameen.
Posted 09 May 2005 - 10:44 AM
I agree with sisters ,brother really that is not big deal as you feel,it is a few things you do it and everything will be fine ..I was like you ,so i advice you to discover yourself a little and if you want to get ride from shyness take one good friend that you used to feel good with in talking and share times and slowly take 2 and maybe invited them to your home for pizza or go to play sport in weekend and slowly with more plans you will feel more social and no shy in public,also if you want to find friend online ,try to choose the one who have somethin in common or interest like you have because this friendship will be and influence for goodness inshallah like learn deen or languages or any thing interest you .finally as sister noor said smile is important thing ,i mean when you smile you gain half % from the next personality without start talking sometimes ....
if aman Allah ,
Posted 09 May 2005 - 11:13 AM
firstly, Inshallah i hope u do come on this forum more, because believe me..there are loads of very nice muslims on this forum..that are very helpful and friendly etc..
secondly..i know im a sister..but i sort of went through what your going through, as ive always been a shy girl...and have refrained from many things due to my shyness...
but now Alhamdu'Lilah, im glad im shy...i have been saved from many sins..that i could have commited..and most importantly....being shy is a great thing...it does give you more respect from other people....being shy and humble etc is the best way...especially...if you want to get close to Allah swt...
Yeah, true it would be good for you to have a close relative or friend to talk to etc...but InshAllah...in the meantime..it would be best to 100% turn to Allah swt, as on the day of judgement we would want Allah swt to be our close friend..and read plenty of daruud shariff InshAllah..
sorry if i have written anything bad..plz forgive me..
Posted 09 May 2005 - 02:05 PM
i was 'lonely' when i first came to IF. 'Lonely' in inverted comma because i made myself feel that way.
Insha Allah i can help you out. Just hit me on MSN anytime;
umarm21[at]hotmail(contact admin if its a beneficial link)
If i don't see you on MSN then maybe i'll just post something for you on this thread.