58 replies to this topic

[baree_]

Post some funny quotes here.


As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown up, a credit card does it.
-- Sam Ewing (Readers Digest, Dec, 1997)

Money isn't everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children.
-- J. Paul Getty

[baree_]

I frankly felt like the reception we received on the way in from the airport was very warm and hospitable. And I want to thank the Canadian people who came out to wave -- with all five fingers -- for their hospitality.
-- George W. Bush

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.
-- Samuel Goldwyn

[friend of all]

I frankly felt like the reception we received on the way in from the airport was very warm and hospitable. And I want to thank the Canadian people who came out to wave -- with all five fingers -- for their hospitality.
-- George W. Bush

funniest moron
I love his funny quotes.

[friend of all]

“Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything. 14% of people know that.”
- Homer Simpson

[baree_]

Nobody believes the official spokesman, but everybody trusts an unidentified source.
-- Ron Nesen

[baree_]

We were so poor my daddy unplugged the clocks when we went to bed.
-- Chris Rock

[baree_]

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.
-- Milton Berle

The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a window.
-- Robert Paul

[Hasib]

The obstacle IS the path
- Zen saying

[baree_]

You can't expect to hit the jackpot if you don't put a few nickels in the machine.
-- Flip Wilson

[Lateral]

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.

A poet can survive everything but a misprint.

In America the President reigns for four years, and Journalism governs forever and ever.

Success is a science; if you have the conditions, you get the result.

The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is not read.

When good americans die they go to paris; When bad americans die they go to america.

Oscar Wilde

[baree_]

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.
-- Douglas Adams

[zabrina]

/ Peace to all,

Here is one :

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman

[zabrina]

/ Peace to all,

This is both funny and true...

What comes out of you when you are squeezed is what is inside you.
- Wayne Dyer

Sis Zabrina

[mintyfresh]

" I have made good decisions in the Past...I have made good decisions in the Future"

"The French have no word for Entrepeneur"


George.W.Bush

Edited by Abu_Sulaiman, 06 March 2006 - 03:27 PM.

[friend of all]

"When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room."
--Woody Allen.

"I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife."
--Ilie Nastase.

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes."
--Anonymous.

[mintyfresh]

LOL at Ilie Nastase!!!


A. Sulaiman

Edited by Abu_Sulaiman, 09 March 2006 - 05:47 PM.

[zabrina]

/ Peace to all,

"My friendship is like an onion which has many
layers in it. It will add taste to your life ,
but if u try to cut it, u will have tears in
your eyes........"

Author : Unknown

Sis Zabrina

[friend of all]

An apple a day keeps a doctor away. An onion a day keeps everyone away.
-Unknow

[zabrina]

/ Peace to all,

My friend send me this and i think it is hilarious!

"God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked,
the good fortune to run into the ones that I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference."

Author : Unknown

Sis Zabrina

[friend of all]

"The problem isn't with Bush's sincerity, but with his evident conviction that he's doing God's will." -- Martin E. Marty, "The Sin of Pride," Newsweek, March 2003

“Marge! Look at all this great stuff I found at the Marina. It was just sitting in some guy's boat!”
-- Homer Simpson