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DEEP LOVE FOR A HUSBAND-IS IT ENOUGH?


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#1 londonfemale

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Posted 26 December 2004 - 02:18 AM

I REALLY DO LOVE MY HUSBAND SO MUCH SO THAT WHEN WE ARGUE IT HURTS ME- WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED 2.4 YEARS (LOVE MARRIAGE) AND HAVE KNOWN EACHOTHER FOR 10 YEARS. HOWEVER IM HAVING DOUBTS ABOUT THE MARRIAGE (MAYBE ITS SHAITAN|) BECAUSE HE IS NOT FULFILLING ONE MAIN DUTY- COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME WHICH DUAS TO READ TO BRING TOGETHER HUSBAND AND WIFE AND MAKE THEM CLOSER- WE HAVE ENOUGH PROBLEMS WITH HIS FAMILY DISLIKING ME WITHOUT HAVING PERSONAL ISSUES AS WELL- PLEASE REFER ME TO DUAS I CAN READ- THANKS

#2 zee

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Posted 26 December 2004 - 06:35 PM

aoa

i will see what i can find for you sister regarding dua for your husband

ws

#3 Sofiaa

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Posted 26 December 2004 - 06:40 PM

AOA:

Salam sister. May Allah ease your pain.

Recire Ya Waddu in abdunance. Try reciting it 1000 times everyday.

#4 Cobra

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Posted 26 December 2004 - 07:36 PM

:D

sister london, do you think you can tell us what exactly is the main duty that your husband isn't fulfilling? perhaps we can give you some advice along with prayers that will help you. take care.

:D

#5 Swift

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 12:19 AM

:D

just as a reminder to fellow brothers and sister...when u put a dua...try putting down the daleel for it. ie any hadith quran etc...inshAllah this will be the more correct way to do it :D

#6 Sofiaa

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 04:06 AM

:D

just as a reminder to fellow brothers and sister...when u put a dua...try putting down the daleel for it. ie any hadith quran etc...inshAllah this will be the more correct way to do it :D

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>


Sure.

I read this in Al Hisnul Hasin By Allamah Muhammad Al-Jazari which is a comprehensive collection of masnoon duas.

Ya Wadudu is one of the 99 names of Allah and it means The most loving. It is recited to create a strong bond of love and affection between people especially husband and wives.

Hope this helps.

#7 sis Qassab

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 04:33 AM

Ya Wadudu is one of the 99 names of Allah and it means The most loving. It is recited to create a strong bond of love and affection between people especially husband and wives.


Everytime people tell u read this name of Allah SWT to get this and this, and if u recite this name you will get children or love between husband and wife will be instilled in their hearts once again, it is NOT true.

There are no saheeh hadeeths to prove it and it is bid'ah.

salaam

#8 sis Qassab

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 04:36 AM

Sister londonF. just pray to Allah and ask for what you want. There is no need to have a special du'ah in this case. Begin the du'ah with sending salaam to rasulAllah SAW and then praise Allah SWT and glorify His name, after that make ur du'ah.
I find this to be a good way.

salaam

#9 Branwen

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 01:05 PM

As-salaamu alaykum.

It is reported that the Prophet (PBUH) said: "No preoccupying concern or sadness inflicts a bondservant whereupon he says : Allahumma 'innee 'abduka, wabnu 'abdika, wabnu 'amatike, nasiyatee biyadika, madhin fiyya hukmuka, adlun fiyya qadha'uka, 'as'aluka bikulli 'ismin huwa laka, sammayta bihi nafsaka, 'aw 'anzaltahu fee kitabika, 'aw 'allamtahu 'ahadan min khaliqika, 'aw 'ista'tharta bihi fee 'ilmil ghaybi 'indaka, 'an taj'alal-qurana rabee 'a qalbee, wa noora sadree, wa jala'a huznee, aw thahba hammee , except that Allah (SWT) would dispel his concern and sadness and replace it with ease and relaxation for him.

It means: "Oh, Allah, I am your bondservant, son of your bondsman and son of your bondswoman. My forelock is in your Hands; your judgment is continuously being carried out upon me; your sentence upon me is Just. I ask You with every name that is yours, with which you have named yourself, brought down in your book, taught to one of your creation, or preferred for Yourself in your Hidden Knowledge, with You: that you make the Qur'an the spring of my heart, and the light of my chest, and the despellation of my sadness and deportation of my concern."

Ibn Taymiya referenced the above to Ahmad and Al-Albani has said that it is sound.

May Allah (SWT) ease your pain, Sister.

#10 Sofiaa

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 02:19 PM

Everytime people tell u read this name of Allah SWT to get this and this, and if u recite this name you will get children or love between husband and wife will be instilled in their hearts once again, it is NOT true.

There are no saheeh hadeeths to prove it and it is bid'ah.

salaam

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>


Assalam-U-Alaikum:

Sister, first of all let me say that when a Muslim starts a communication, it is recommended that it be started with a salutation. Please do not deprive us of your salutations :D

And as far as my post is concerned, I never said it was from Saheeh Hadiths. These wazeefas were taught by some religious and pious people who practiced upon them.

Sister LondonFemale: I don't see what harm reciting Allah's name can bring. I have practiced upon it and found it to be helpful. I don't know why people have to make things so difficult. Anyway, good luck.

AH

#11 Swanlake

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 02:36 PM

:D

Islam states the rights of spouses clearly, and urges and obliges each partner to fulfil them, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “… And they (women) have rights (over their husbands…) similar (to those of their husbands) over them, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them…� [al-Baqarah 2:228]. This aayah indicates that for every right that one partner has, there is a corresponding duty which the other partner must fulfil; thus balance will be achieved in all aspects of the relationship, which will strengthen the stability of family life. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) said concerning this aayah: “It is their (women’s) right to good companionship and proper treatment on the part of their husbands, and their duty to obey and do what their husbands tell them to do.� Ibn Zayd said: “Fear Allaah with regard to them (wives) just as they should fear Allaah with regard to you.� Al-Qurtubi said: “This aayah covers all the rights and duties within marriage.�

One of those rights is that trivial mistakes should be overlooked, especially words and deeds by which no harm was intended. Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Every son of Adam makes mistakes, and the best of those who make mistakes are those who repent.� (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2501; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 4/171).

Both husband and wife have to be patient and put up with one another, because everyone makes mistakes, and the one with whom you have to be most patient is the one with whom you live and interacts with most. Neither party should resort to tit-for-tat reactions. If one spouse sees that the other is very angry, he or she should restrain his or her own anger, and not respond immediately. For this reason Abu’l-Darda’ said to his wife: “If you see me angry, calm me down, and if I see you angry, I will calm you down, otherwise it will be too difficult to live together.� The imaam of Ahl al-Sunnah, Imaam Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him) married ‘Abbaasah

bint al-Mufaddal, the mother of his son Saalih, and he used to say of her: “Umm Saalih lived with me for twenty years, and we never argued over the slightest thing.�

One of the most important rights/duties is that each spouse should advise and remind the other to obey Allaah. It is reported in a saheeh hadeeth that a group of the Sahaabah asked the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Teach us which kind of wealth is best, so that we may try to acquire it?� He said: “The best is a remembering tongue (one that remembers Allaah), a grateful heart and a believing wife who helps one’s faith.� (Reported by Ahmad, 5/278; al-Tirmidhi, 3039; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5231).

A man should not make his wife angry if he sees in her something that he dislikes, because if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will like another, so he should balance the two. The Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No believing man should hate a believing woman: if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will like another.� (Reported by Muslim, 36). Samurah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Woman was created from a rib, and if you try to straighten a rib you will break it, so deal with her gently.� (Reported by Ahmad, 5/8; Ibn Hibbaan, 1308; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2/163).

One of the best ways to ensure a good atmosphere between husband and wife is a good attitude, hence Islam placed an important emphasis on this matter. The Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was the ultimate in good treatment of others and good attitude. Abu’l-Darda’ reported that the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no good deed that will be put in the balance that will weight heavier than a good attitude. The one who has a good attitude will reach, because of it, the level of those who fast and pray.� (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2003; Abu Dawood, 4799). Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The most perfect of the believers in faith are the best in attitude, and the best of you are those who are best to their womenfolk.� (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 1/217; Ahmad, 2/250; Al-Silsilat al-Saheehah, 284).

excerpts from Islamqa
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid ([img]Islam-qa(contact admin if its a beneficial link))

Edited by Swanlake, 27 December 2004 - 02:49 PM.


#12 Swanlake

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 02:37 PM

Assalam-U-Alaikum:

Sister, first of all let me say that when a Muslim starts a communication, it is recommended that it be started with a salutation. Please do not deprive us of your salutations  :D

And as far as my post is concerned, I never said it was from Saheeh Hadiths.  These wazeefas were taught by some religious and pious people who practiced upon them. 

Sister LondonFemale:  I don't see what harm reciting Allah's name can bring.  I have practiced upon it and found it to be helpful.  I don't know why people have to make things so difficult. Anyway, good luck.   

AH

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>



:D

Sister if this act wasnt done by our prophet, then it would be bid'ah (innovation) wouldnt it?

#13 sis Qassab

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 04:50 PM

Assalam-U-Alaikum:

Sister, first of all let me say that when a Muslim starts a communication, it is recommended that it be started with a salutation. Please do not deprive us of your salutations  :D

And as far as my post is concerned, I never said it was from Saheeh Hadiths.  These wazeefas were taught by some religious and pious people who practiced upon them. 

Sister LondonFemale:  I don't see what harm reciting Allah's name can bring.  I have practiced upon it and found it to be helpful.  I don't know why people have to make things so difficult. Anyway, good luck.   

AH

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>



wsalaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. I sometimes only end with my salaam, sorry if it bothers you. :P



I know it is not from any saheeh hadeeths that's why I reacted.

I am not against calling Allah SWT by His beautiful names, what I am against is when religious/pious people tell for example that if you read this name of Allah SWT you will get this, and you will have children or you will find something that you lost. I used to have a whole list of the things I would get if I read a certain name of Allah SWT. I found out that it was ALL lies, the list would for example say if you recite the name An Noor 250 times every night you will get noor in your heart. Did rasulAllah SAW say that? HOW do these people know that that is true. They don't, they are just making up stuff. It is not from qur'an nor hadeeth so it is a lie. And we should avoid bid'ahs like these, bid'ahs lead to hell.

One more thing, there is no such thing as luck, only qadr. Luck is actually shirk. It has no power.

And Allah knows best.

sorry about beeing harsh. :D

Fi aman Allah.

#14 Guest_Guest_sister in islam_*_*

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 10:04 PM

Salam,

I dont think stating who is right and wrong amongst our selves is really helping the sister.

Sister I think you really should make dua to Allah that he makes the love grow between you and your husband there is nothing more of a dua form i can say then saying it in your own words. Express your feelings in your own words as Allah likes that. Do Nafl Salah and make dua, recite dorood shariff and the beuatiful names of Allah. Say astagfirullah and read shahada. sister really thast all you can do is make dua with your won words as you can say anything and everything you want. Ask for forgivness.

I really find it useful to do that when time is really bad for me i make dua with my own words and express my self to Allah, as the things i can say to Allah i will never be able to say it to any human, as humans dont have time for that. Allah has all the time for you. Believe me you will feel reelived that you have taken everything fo your heart and you will feel free.

I hope i was of some help sister.

wasalam,

#15 drim

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Posted 27 December 2004 - 11:35 PM

you should read this for all worries in between sunnah and farz of fajr prayer
ya haiyul qayumo berahmate astagheeso

#16 sister in islam

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Posted 30 December 2004 - 02:40 PM

you should read this for all worries in between sunnah and farz of fajr prayer
ya haiyul qayumo berahmate astagheeso

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>



Salam,

What does that mean? please translate :D

thanks

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Posted 31 December 2004 - 11:09 AM

wsalaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. I sometimes only end with my salaam, sorry if it bothers you. :P
I know it is not from any saheeh hadeeths that's why I reacted.

I am not against calling Allah SWT by His beautiful names, what I am against is when religious/pious people tell for example  that if you read this name of Allah SWT you will get this, and you will have children or you will find something that you lost. I used to have a whole list of the things I would get if I read a certain name of Allah SWT. I found out that it was ALL lies, the list would for example say if you recite the name An Noor 250 times every night you will get noor in your heart. Did rasulAllah SAW say that? HOW do these people know that that is true. They don't, they are just making up stuff. It is not from qur'an nor hadeeth so it is a lie. And we should avoid bid'ahs like these, bid'ahs lead to hell.

One more thing, there is no such thing as luck, only qadr. Luck is actually shirk. It has no power.

And Allah knows best.

sorry about beeing harsh. :D

Fi aman Allah.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>


:D

This sister is correct.

In urdu there is a saying, "Man waa na hai tho Rabb ka Quran lao, ya tho Madine wale ka farmaan lao"

"If you want to convince me, bring the Rabb's Quran (an ayat) or a statement (hadith) from the Prophet (SAW)"

No matter who said what, If Shaikh Bin Baz said something....but couldnt produce evidence to support his statement then we are not obliged to follow ...no matter how pious or whatever.

If you dont have these two to back up statements of the nature that were posted (such as....say An Noor 1000x, and you will get light in your heart) then these are very misguided and dangerous.

So stay away from this...

:P

#18 ummammaar

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Posted 31 December 2004 - 09:17 PM

:D

Hisn Husain, as I have mentioned in another thread, is a book with many fabricated things. We have the Quran and and authentic ahadith. The best book is the Book of Allah and the best guidance is the guidance of Muhammad (salallahu 'alayhi wassallam).

Muhammad ibn Sireen (rahimahullah said) (paraphrased)..that knowledge is your deen, so look to who you take it from.

"And our duty is only to convey plainly (the Message)." (Yasin:17) Allahu alam.

:D to the members who provided saheeh daleel in their posts. BarakAllah feekum.
[img]"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_forums.gawaher(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/index.php?showtopic=4878"]Hisnul Muslim (Fortification of the Muslim) dua book.[/url]

No matter who said what, If Shaikh Bin Baz said something....but couldnt produce evidence to support his statement then we are not obliged to follow ...no matter how pious or whatever.

Yes, we shouldn't blind follow anyone except the Prophet, yanee saheeh ahadith. Laakin, unlike some "scholars" some mashaikh do not always quote ahadith because they have many questions to answer, many duroos to give, and some of them are also Muslim judges. As you can see, they don't always have tme to quote ALL the hadith and ayaat. Sometimes scholars give a talk and then someoen asks a question, then don't always start quoting all the daleel again. At any rate, their not always quoting does not prove that they are just speaking without knowledge. And yes, everyone can make mistakes, even scholars. However, the scholars who do not speak from desires are rewarded for their ijtihad, Wallahu alam.

may Allah guide us all, ameen.

Edited by ummammaar, 31 December 2004 - 09:27 PM.


#19 Sia

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Posted 31 December 2004 - 10:40 PM

Salaam wa alaikum
i would just like ot say that so many people are syaing good things in this post mahsallah
i agree that you shpould use your own words sister
but, i have heard of thing like if you do say a certain phrase.word you will acquire this.
there are so many useful tips.advices out there, many of them may be true
so please, of anyone wants to advise someone, please can you use someting to back up your opinion, like where you got that particular phrase from, what it means etc.

to londonfemale: salaam wa alaikum sister. althought i am not yet in your situation i realise you may be going throught hwat you think is a hard time. i am not syaing its isnt a hard time but Allah swt does not but really heavu burdens on to us.
i think you should sit down with your husband and discuss what is in your mind in the appropriate manner (kind of course) and please be patient.

i think you should do your own dua.
you could start with the tings people have listen above and i also read from the 'Manzil' book that when one duas, he/she should end the dua by reading durood shareef. there are two of them. they start off by Allah humma sallee a la ....... etc.
by doing this the person has done the dua and it said to have been favoured by Allah swt.

anyhow my advice to you, please remain patient. i always thought that if Allah swt puts you through somehting he will always make sure that you will go throught that experience/thing succesffully.
for example/ we all knwo that life is a test by Allah swt and by doing this test we are making ourselves aplace in heaven by doing good deeds/actions of course.
remember Allah is testing each and evryone of us. do dua to him. he can hear you if not others after all he si the all hearing. what you want, Allah will inshallah provide if it is good. im sure you know what i mean. do dua to Allah swt.

also another thing is that i have read that reading suratul baqarah from the begining to the end is said to make the shaytaan run away. i think you should do this.
i also think that you should engage in somehting Islamical. like reading nafl prayers, reciting quran and doing tasbee. (like subhanallah, alhamdulillah)

sorry if this post is long just that i wanted to advise to my full potential
hope you can gather soehintg by all the advice give to you sister.
inshallah you shall be ok

Allahfiz

#20 Muslimah4eva

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Posted 02 January 2005 - 05:35 PM

Everytime people tell u read this name of Allah SWT to get this and this, and if u recite this name you will get children or love between husband and wife will be instilled in their hearts once again, it is NOT true.

There are no saheeh hadeeths to prove it and it is bid'ah.

salaam

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>


:D
sister if what you are saying is true then why is it that great ulama have written kitaabs on the 99 names odf Allah and what you can benefit from them?
kitaabs such as asma ul husna by moulana ashraf ali thanwi (R.A)
:D