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  1. Suprise 4 Him

    salam sisters! i'm livin with a frend at the mo but inshallah we may have someone that will marry us this saturday..kinda nervous about it as i always thought i would have my family at my wedding. i have tried to speak to mum but it wasn't a very nice conversation... i have spoken to my younger brother and sisters, miss them so much its unreal :D i pray that eventually my family, especially my mum will accept our marriage. U know i really c now how much their izaat (dignity) means to them, even at the expense of their own bloods' happiness. there r so many rumours goin round bout me ii jus getso frustrated! i mean i have never been centre of attention for anything but i am now...and 4 the wrong reasons!lol i will always miss my family, n of course they will always b in my heart even if i cant c them or speak to them but i have to concerntrate on my new life that involves a very important person...my husband... (g it feels weird sayin that?!) :D wasalam
  2. Suprise 4 Him

    salam! thank you 4 ur replies... il try n not make it obvious and ask him wot he thinks! well its been hard, sorry it is still really hard... i left home...so my family didnt come round the whole idea, well some members of the family did, but not my mum - the main person. like i said, its very hard dealing with it, but alhumdulillah i am happy with him Assalamu alaikum
  3. Suprise 4 Him

    Salam I just wanted to know if men that wear silver rings can have Islamic writing on the inside? It's just i bought a wedding ring for my other half and he wanted the shahadah written on the inside of the ring, and i wana suprise him with it..if it's allowed! Thank you Assalamu alaikum
  4. Wanting To Get Married But Need Advice

    salam How long has it been that u aint seen her? Are you sure u want to marry her? you sure its not just u missin the good old school days? if u are serious about her then maybe u should let her about ur intention and c how she feels, coz its no good u tellin ur family and her sayin no??? Allahafiz
  5. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salaam S.I.I did you vote for the old way back?! i dont like this way either actually.. just so that you are aware, i think we are all livin on the same land, which i dont think is coocko land.. we haven't come to a decision, these are options which we may have to take up if the family dont agree, only because at the moment we have a financial problem... so waiting for their reply may cause a problem rather than a solution. Thankyo for ur advice... Allahafiz
  6. Counselling Room

    sallam If possible can ew bring it back to the way it was, because when posts are added no1 knows who is giving advice to who, it;s just confusing Allahafiz
  7. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salam... i haven't taken a third party to speak to them, my immediate family know and none of them agree with it. if i did take a third party to speak to them then they will say things like wot are u doin, y r u involvlin the world in our affairs etc. i dont wana bad mouth my family but they are being very unreasonable. it doesnt matter what i say Islamically or not im still wrong... Assalamu alaikum
  8. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salaam sister i understand what u are saying... my mum and one of my brothers are quite religious, my mum prays 5 times a day and her iman is strong, my brother is studying at an Islamic school so he is quite strong in his faith too. u asked if there might be any other reason y they are disagreein to the wedding? it is purely for the izaat of the family... because there has been no mixed cultures in our family it is a shock to the system... i have explained the situation in previous posts so feel free to read.. jazakallah bout my nan Assalamu alaikum
  9. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    the problme is time is running out, his visa will expire soon and we are tryin to find solutions for him to extend his stay in england... we will marry eachother whether my family say yes or no but i was wondering whether it is wrong to get married without the family
  10. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salamm bros/sis been a long time since i've been on here, ive had alot going on... but i need some advice... from an Islamic point of view, if i had to leave my family coz they werent acceptin my relationship with pna01 would it be ok for us to marry? or would we need some1 from my family to be a witness? any advice would be great Assalamu alaikum
  11. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salaam i went hope tuesday evening and found out that my brother told my mum bout the conversation btwn me and him, so mum basically found out that i dont want to go ahead with the proposal. i got home and mum was just crying, and my lil brother and sisters were crying aswell seeing mum in that state. i didnt know what was up with her until bro called up and told me. mum jus wouldnt speak to anyone or even move out of the position she was in! later that night we spoke and when i saind i cant do it she was very upset again, i told Allah has given me feelings and i did istekarah and dont think i should go ahead with the proposal. she was saying things like she did istekarah too and it was all good from they guys side and mine and because she got it done from a very religious imam, my istekarah dont mean nothing! well at least mum knows i dont want to go ahead with it.its just so hard everyone in my family blaming me for anyone that is upset about this whole thing, my brother said i couldnt come back to work becasue pna01 works with me and they think thats the whole reason im saying no to the proposal...well it is but im not confirming that just yet. im at work as i said i have to be because im covering for a manager and mum said i have to hand in my notice. i jus feel every day could b my last day that i can actually speak to ppl, coz if they take me out of work then i have no means of contact with any1... Alhamdulillah Allah has given me the courage to speak my heart to my family, i just need all the courage i can get to help me through this. Assalamu alaikum
  12. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salam sis sorry i though pna01 fille u in so i dint have to?? welll i tried to put them off but it dint work, his family left me a present which i later found out they wanted my hand in marriage... my aunty spoke to me after they left n i sai di dint like him she kept askin me 4 reasons y i dint like him...i couldnt tell her about pna01 at that point coz i dint think it was the right time. she said i had to tell my mum myself that i dint wwant to go ahead with it. i have been givin her the vibes that im not interested but it seems like they want to go ahead wit it too. i was gona speak to mum one night but she had fainted due to worryin about my gran being hospital and probly about me. so i kinda thought i dont wana lump her with this aswell. I did istekarah... i saw Allah (s.w.t) saying the path ur takin is correct and dont let the ppl in the world come in ur way! allahmdullilah! w/salam
  13. They Wont Except Any Other Coulture

    salam thank you for praying for us, inshallah everything will work out for the best... but yeah myself and pna01 will keep u brothers and sisters updated... if only u guys could come and speak to my family!!! w/salam
  14. Need Some Help...

    salam paintballer... Alhamdulillah with ur convertion brother... have u taken the declaration of faith with the sisters' mum present?... another good idea which PNA01 used was to type sentences of the prayer on A4 paper with the meanings below it and stuck them on his bedroom walls... if u give him ur email add maybe he can forward them on to u if he still has them? may Allah help u expand ur knowledge in Islam, and altough u are a beginner ur dwa's (prayers) will be accepted by Allah easier than mine so please do include me in ur prayers... w/salaam
  15. Hatred For Sibblings & Marriage Issue

    salaam sis Dont feel alone sis, i go thru a similar prob with my family. in my family the boys can get away with murder, but if they girls make 1 mistake then everythin is taken away from her,honestly it's insane! I have 3 sis n 3 bros, i am the eldest girl and i have a bro who is older than me. my mum keeps tellin me that the lil ones learn from their elders so if im good then they will be too. But tehn my elder bro can go mess about and then taht rule doesn't apply? I have fallen in love with a white muslim n they found out bout this n r not happy. they have kept this away from my siblings thinking that if they came to know bout this then they will feel they can do the same...which i feel isnt really true, as everyone is responsible for their own actions. Every wrong move the lil ones make i get the blame for coz im the "big sis", they youngsters look up to me, they will follow what i do! it is so annoying, i feel like i cant really live my life, always thinkin what if, and trying to do what they want. I too want to live my life in an Islamic manner but there is always so much going on the family, such as personal issues that i feel like i have to give up my time to help with those issues... and if u dont then ur selfish an inconsiderate...how unfair. To be quite honest my freinds know me better than my family, only coz i cant open up to my family, i mean yeah they all say 'we'r here 4 u, dont hesitate to come to us if u have a problem' but when u do then its 'y do u feel like that?!' 'y did u do that?!' and then they're on ur case 24/7 watchin u like a hawk... im worried i might be like that towards my kids, u know, all shouty and judgemental, and suspicious. Anyways i think u should stick to what u beleive, pray to Allah to strengthen ur faith and theirs. i dO understand how u feel, read the topic on "they wont accept another culture"