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candy candy

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About candy candy

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  1. Feelings Of Envy, Regret And Exasperation

    InshahAllah.....i hope for the best The replies are really satisfying....thank you for reading my post and adding replies.... but still today i am feeling so lonely and depressed....my heart is so heavy like someone has put a huge rock over me..... I dont know whats wrong with me.....May Allah help
  2. Salam Friends I have been writing to this forum for many months due to the problems i have been facing and fortunately I have received the best suggestions, comments and advice over the pathetic matters happened in my life...but still today My heart is so heavy and dull...The feelings of regret over fornication and so called love have dwelled envy and exasperation inside me against the people whom i see happy and satisfied....I dont know whats wrong with me....I pray and read Quran alot and do zikr but it seems that the Allah is angry with me and Allah should be because I crossed the limits and transgressed the limits of Islam....but Allah is Oft Forgiving then why Allah is not listening to me and If Allah is listening then why i am still facing this tough situation...even right now i am in my office but i really want to hit my head hard into the wall and want to kill that S***bag and want to kill his Ex girl due to which he did all this to me...but at the sametime i think about the reality also....the reality is that he was not completely responsible for everything and I dont even know that lady from whom i feel jealous....Sometimes i feel like why the people are happy and why i am not...how people successfully manage relationships and get the love of their life and live happily...why the things dont work for me....I am an unsuccessful girl....I always wanted to marry and still I want to but I dont know why i cant forget him...I curse him curse him and curse him because i have gone crazy.... Goshhhh.....whats wrong with me....I want to get out of all this but nothing is happening in my favour....then i think that i would keep myself busy in my work but my job is so weird and pathetic that i cant keep myself busy even....i dont know why this mess up is not ending up....Why Allah is not lessening the tensions and burdens for me....I know this is not right to complain but i am so tired and messed up....i was never like this, i was full of life and so good but the kick in love has ruined me and has shattered my girly dreams and everything.... I dont know what to do and what not to do....I just want to know how to forget him and everything...i dont want to be a sinner anymore....i dont want to commit any sin ....i dont want to hurt anyone.....i dnt want to do anything that could make Allah angry....might be i am facing the punishment of my sins but i know Allah is oft forgiving.... I am really upset right now...it seems like that i wont ever find a loving man....it seems as that i wont be happy again and i would stay the same....Gosh....i dont know what to do....my heart is so heavy and hurt....i am having tears in my eyes....i keep on crying the whole day that whats wrong with me....i know i have gone crazy and i wont be fine ever....my family feels as i wont be able to find a good man ever.,...even they are facing so problems regarding finding a perfect match....they dont know what to do and what not to do.....Gosh....dont know what to write.... please guide and pray for me.....
  3. Love Problem

    thank you all for reading my post and helping me might be i have gone mad thats why i am doing all this ####...........i dont know whats wrong with me.............. why doesnt Allah help me if I am asking for His help in this pathetic situation..............I am depressed and shattered and cant see anything right now......... dont know what to do............and how to do it
  4. Love Problem

    Dear Friends...... Being a Muslim, I have always been inclined towards my religion wholeheartedly. I have always prayed to Allah for every little thing. And still I always pray to Allah for helping me and keeping me away from all the bad deeds. But now I believe that in-spite of knowing all the realities and facts I am unable to control myself from getting derailed. Few Months back, I fell in love with a guy and I dont know what made me realized that he is the one I was looking for or he is the one Allah has sent for me only. But unfortunately, loads of sins have taken place that I am unable to stop myself. I dont know why I am flowing with the river of his love towards a wrong direction. He believes in pre-marital sex and has a blind faith that it increases the strength of love and bondage between the two people. I dont know why i believed him regarding this ideology and committed this sin. I have always asked him to marry me first and then we would pursue all this but he always ignored this saying that if Allah wanted me to marry you than I would otherwise i wont marry you. I always discuss with him this matter that if you would keep on pushing me towards sex then how come Allah would help us in getting married. but he dont understand anything. The interesting part of my love story is that the man is honest with me but I dont know why does he always want to have sex and why he keeps on making me realize that sex is a good thing and you should enjoy it rather getting tensed and all that. I love him and truly wants to marry him since the very first day but he keeps on ignoring this important thing and just wants to have sex. He is not a fraud nor a liar. He is mediocre in following religion too. he believes that if Allah's will is there in something then that event would occur. But I dont know why dont he realize the importance of marriage. I feel so guilty of committing this sin but I always did it due to fear of losing him. The day I would refuse him to do this, he would leave me forever and ever although I feel that what would i do then..............I dont want to marry another man and dont want to deceive any other person...........I am guilty and would be..... I keep on praying that Allah please soften his heart and make him realize that marriage is important and it is a good thing. I dont know where I am moving or flowing to......I never wanted to do this in my life but I did it because I love him and might be keep on doing it if I wont stop my self from this sin.......I dont know what to do............. I am the second girl in his life and he has been involved with the first girl for about six years. Before our commitment he had explained me everything regarding his previous love experience that how he managed to successfully have sex everyday with that girl and she never refused him. I was shocked and amazed to hear all this but he made me realized that he wanted to marry her after having six years of severe sexual relationship but the parents of that girl married her to a doctor. He explained me that how he prayed and performed wazifas to marry but Allah didnt help him. he still misses her alot and always keep on explaining me the facts regarding his sexual life with her..... I always wanted him to have a clean life now but I dont know how this thing is happening with me like the story is repeating on its own. I hate myself now but I always pray to Allah to help me and Him and save us from this pathetic sin. Guys help me and guide me........... Please its a request to ponder over this situation. I want to marry him but I am failing to convince him. Sometimes I feel that he wont marry me for sure but then I feel that if my intentions have been to marry him than Allah would help me.........i am very guilty although very very guilty..............i am upset tensed and depressed........ i dont know what to do now..........how to convince him...........what to do ............I dont know anything I have been captured my the satin and feel unable to escape from these feelings because I love him and want to marry him or I would be ruined destroyed forever................ helppppp.................
  5. Love Problem

    Dear Friends...... Being a Muslim, I have always been inclined towards my religion wholeheartedly. I have always prayed to Allah for every little thing. And still I always pray to Allah for helping me and keeping me away from all the bad deeds. But now I believe that in-spite of knowing all the realities and facts I am unable to control myself from getting derailed. Few Months back, I fell in love with a guy and I dont know what made me realized that he is the one I was looking for or he is the one Allah has sent for me only. But unfortunately, loads of sins have taken place that I am unable to stop myself. I dont know why I am flowing with the river of his love towards a wrong direction. He believes in pre-marital sex and has a blind faith that it increases the strength of love and bondage between the two people. I dont know why i believed him regarding this ideology and committed this sin. I have always asked him to marry me first and then we would pursue all this but he always ignored this saying that if Allah wanted me to marry you than I would otherwise i wont marry you. I always discuss with him this matter that if you would keep on pushing me towards sex then how come Allah would help us in getting married. but he dont understand anything. The interesting part of my love story is that the man is honest with me but I dont know why does he always want to have sex and why he keeps on making me realize that sex is a good thing and you should enjoy it rather getting tensed and all that. I love him and truly wants to marry him since the very first day but he keeps on ignoring this important thing and just wants to have sex. He is not a fraud nor a liar. He is mediocre in following religion too. he believes that if Allah's will is there in something then that event would occur. But I dont know why dont he realize the importance of marriage. I feel so guilty of committing this sin but I always did it due to fear of losing him. The day I would refuse him to do this, he would leave me forever and ever although I feel that what would i do then..............I dont want to marry another man and dont want to deceive any other person...........I am guilty and would be..... I keep on praying that Allah please soften his heart and make him realize that marriage is important and it is a good thing. I dont know where I am moving or flowing to......I never wanted to do this in my life but I did it because I love him and might be keep on doing it if I wont stop my self from this sin.......I dont know what to do............. I am the second girl in his life and he has been involved with the first girl for about six years. Before our commitment he had explained me everything regarding his previous love experience that how he managed to successfully have sex everyday with that girl and she never refused him. I was shocked and amazed to hear all this but he made me realized that he wanted to marry her after having six years of severe sexual relationship but the parents of that girl married her to a doctor. He explained me that how he prayed and performed wazifas to marry but Allah didnt help him. he still misses her alot and always keep on explaining me the facts regarding his sexual life with her..... I always wanted him to have a clean life now but I dont know how this thing is happening with me like the story is repeating on its own. I hate myself now but I always pray to Allah to help me and Him and save us from this pathetic sin. Guys help me and guide me........... Please its a request to ponder over this situation. I want to marry him but I am failing to convince him. Sometimes I feel that he wont marry me for sure but then I feel that if my intentions have been to marry him than Allah would help me.........i am very guilty although very very guilty..............i am upset tensed and depressed........ i dont know what to do now..........how to convince him...........what to do ............I dont know anything I have been captured my the satin and feel unable to escape from these feelings because I love him and want to marry him or I would be ruined destroyed forever................ helppppp.................
  6. Depressed,afraid...insecure.

    Hey sweety I just read your problem and felt really sad and gloomy about your ridiculous situation.....Trust me this is a very common problem nowadays among the families and I myself have faced this and still facing this problem regarding my family.....I would advise you to be consistent in your prayers and Quran that would really help you by keeping you cool and calm during this tensed situation.....I understand that you really want a change in your life from every aspect and I truely believe that the family should be supportive and encouraging in building up self esteem and motivation.....but in your case your father does not seem to be the role model and dont worry it happens.......just keep faith on Allah InshahAllah a time would come when you would be able to talk to your parents about this situation and might be they want you to talk to them.....Might be they want you to be a strong and active girl so that you could not be astrayed in your life ever.... I know this time frame would be the worst one for you but InshahAllah everything would be fine once you try to change your attitude and behaviour.....try to talk to your family about it.....dont be shy as its your right..........You are in a state of severe psychological pressure which would not allow you to concentrate on anything and you would keep on developing this feeling that everyone hates you and that you are alone in this world etc etc......Trust me when a person is alone and no one cares about him or her them Allah holds the hand of his person and keeps him or her walking straight to the desired direction.....I have always been am active girl and a very talkative one but my family still dont trust me and do not encourage and appreciate me rather I am very obedient to my parents but yet they always keep on thinking about themselves.......at that time there was no one to counsel me and I was alone in the desert always feeling that one day I would die and would not be a matter to anyone........but at that stage Allah held my hand and Trust me I felt this support and Yes Allah is there for everyone....... we are not here to satisfy everyone but still what we can do is that we can help others and try our level best to make them please with our behaviours and attitudes......so do not think that people should be happy with you just change your perception for a while and think that now you have to please others......think to what extent they would ignore you or criticise you?? every thing has a limit so have patience and trust Allah..............but try to change your personality traits like talk to people and explore their minds too.......may be your father is giving you a tough time so that you should have the courage to talk to him and to the other people in order to face the world's challenges..........but dont worry problems are the tests from Allah and you would be successful one day
  7. Being Recluse

    Assalam O Alaikum Dear friends uptil now I have been trying to sort out my issues but i believe that instead of reaching to any specific conclusion I feel that now I m embroiled and feel recluse due to exasperation and a long wait towards the solution I believe that Allah has given me patience to face the ill and monstrous situations even though I try to be heedful in my life. I have always been a very good student and have completed my studies. But this educational journey has been a very tough one that I didnt even know that someday I would be able to complete it with the help of Allah. But now when I have to work, I am not even getting any job. My family believes that I am sitting idle inveterately. My parents had always expected so much from me that I could not fulfill their expectations. On the other hand, after a long wait for my job somehow they want me to get married but there are no proposals, not a single one. I can sense that embarrassment in the eyes of my mother especially and my sisters. My sisters feel that I am a burden now or some kind of curse for them which is like a bad thing to them and to their image in the society. My mother has asked me so many times that if u are interested somewhere then let me know, so that we could marry you there but I dont know what to say. Besides this, I was interested somewhere but that guy refused to marry me. I begged me and requested him to marry me because I loved him so much but he said that he would not marry ever. I talked to him about this issue but he didnt listen me. well on my so much request he is ready to be a friend only. The worst part about my luck is that whenever I try to do something good for myself, the things get worst. I pray regularly, read Quran and do Zikr but I believe that Allah is angry with me regarding my luck. I have been so much upset, depressed and irritated due to worst situations that I always thought that why do I exist if Allah has to be angry with me since my luck is not in my control. My cousins are also angry with me due to certain issues in the family. I dont know why they blame me although I love them and always care for them. I was such a jolly and chill girl that I had never even imagined to face such horrendous situations in my life. I had tried very hard to overcome the problems and begged Allah to forgive me and pull me out of all this bad luck but dont know why I am still stuck. I am helpless for my self. I am a curse for my family as I am unable to help them or to do something good for them. I miss the man I loved. yet today I always request him that please consider my love, my sincerity, my honesty for you but he is cold hearted man. I dont know why I loved him so much when Allah knew he would not love me in return. I believe that there is no one to accept me and to marry me. I dont know why these trials are becoming so tough for me. I dont know what to do I cry and cry and just cry all the time. My heart is broken as it can never be healed again. Everyone hates me. I feel like i am alone in this cruel world. I dont know what to do now. Well is this the reward of being so sincere and honest? Is this the reward of being so self realizable?? Is this the reward of patience?? I dont know how much to suffer further in this life. I feel I am so much tired now. I fed up of being such a loser and a failure. Please suggest me what to do now?? how to stay alive?? Pray for me. I am dead......
  8. Broken Heart/ramadan Ruined!

    hey dear.........i read your post and found that you are among the ones who are facing these issues at a very fast pace.......and unfortunately i am among the ones.....the difference between you and me is that you were with this guy for such a long period of time whereas my time frame was very small......i cried alot just like you.....i was very much exasperated, frustrated, desperate or you can say that i was in a state of hysteria where i used to feel like i would commit suicide and all that......BUT TRUST Allah........i was on the edge of my life and then suddenly i felt that why so much to cry and why to ruin my life just for the person who wont ever give a #### if i die or get insane or whatever........but the one would feel our pain is the one who is Almighty.....Allah...... trust me that if you are consistent in your prayers, reading Quran and referring good Islamic Websites then you would come to realise that you should love Allah only.....and if Allah grants you a good husband than you should love him among all the other men out there........I know and can understand your inner which is completely broken and shattered like it wont be healed again but yet Allah would heal it.......Remember the people who are sincere to someone would get sincerity in return and i believe that you were sincere with this guy and might be he was too.......but may be Allah has selected a best guy for you who would be somewhere around you and you would come across him through marriage one day......... read the Quran after every prayer with full concentration.......do refer to its translation and commentary also......might be you are unaware of something which you would come to know if you would remain consistent in your prayers and Ibadat........remember it is important for this life to not know all the answers.....sometimes it is good not to know everything and just leave it to Allah and then wait for the result......you would see that if due to any reason or due to Allah's will you still face any bad result or failure you wont be sad or despair because Allah would replace that sad and desolate feelings with the satisfied feelings.....and you would yourself become ready to face every challenge.......because life is nothing without a challenge as our studies are nothing without our exams....... remember Allah wants you to be in his best people because might be you have that potential or what so ever you can call it.........if Allah is helping you to come to his path than why are you crying or feeling sad.....i know this is not an easy journey but this is the only journey towards the desired destination......crying, madness, frustration, irritation, exasperation, rudeness etc would give nothing to you but would burden you more then ever before......and why are you crying if this man and this world would not last forever.........why do you cry if u know that you would not live for ever........do not waste your time as you have to think about the other life too the day of judgment........ so make loads of supplication for your self, for your dear ones......and remember Allah would vanish all the sorrows from your life.......and you would feel satisfied that you would love to tell other people like you and me that how badly they are ruining themselves and what they need to do to get them out from this horrendous situation.........talk to Allah whatever you want......you would get your answers.........InshahAllah...........do read surahs before sleeping especially Ayat al Kursi..........loads and loads of times.........and do read the surahs when you get up in the morning because that is the time when satan tries to dominate the person .......... once again.....you are a good human and a good Muslim........you obeyed your parents and you would be rewarded for this.........life is to live for others not to live for ones own-self.......if you would get everything in life then you would have nothing to say even........modify your life and live like a brave person.....Allah is your God whose people on earth are being recognized through their Bravery, Courage and Humanity.............take great care of your self........and do let us know when ever you feel better............it took me an year to get out of this but i pray to Allah that you could get out of this as soon as possible............
  9. ***concern For Allah***

    Indeed
  10. Marriage

    wow..........congratulations have a happy married life
  11. Married

    wow..........congratulations..........may u have a prosperous and a beautiful life.........Ameen
  12. amazing.......SubhanAllah
  13. What Allah Hates...

    amazingly beautifulllll
  14. Dear............i can understand what have been your perceptions, thoughts, dreams and all that.........but the fact is your prayers have blessed you with a very good husband and a son...........remember the person who is responsible for his/her happiness is the person himself/herself..........i know and realize that you always wanted to marry a person of your choice but remember that these are exceptional cases when girls marry the person of their own choice........mostly in our society the guys do not appreciate that girl who wants to marry of her own choice........ i can just say that i have been a girl like you.........i am not married yet but i was interested somewhere but that guy completed ruined everything and shattered my positive perceptions and my dreams...........i cried like hell too.........but now i realize that girls should marry the man who loves them rather marrying a man whom the girl loves........you are a lucky girl who has been blessed with such a caring and lovable husband...........do not ruin your life just for your dreams, thoughts and perceptions..........sometimes the things do not work in the same way the way we plan and implement them and then we repent.......because there is some power over there which is controlling our decisions..........and there are loads of secrets and in depth situations which we can not understand.........and comprehend..........so pleaseeee............enjoy your married life Allah has blessed you with what you wanted............but the point is that you are a human who needs to thank Allah for all his blessings...........i hope this makes sense and could help you in this situation Take care and regards
  15. Trouble With Dad

    hey dear well dont be upset because this is the thing that most girls (daughters) face, even myself is facing this situation but this reaction and rudeness would not sort out the problem really rather would make him more possessive about you. You should talk to your mother and tell her that if she could talk on your behalf to your dad. well if this does not work then you should better talk to your father and discuss the situation with him that you are a grown up girl and you need to be treated like a mature lady rather as a child. but do not become frustrated as parents never feel that their children have grown up and that their priorities are changing too. its just the natural phenomena. and the fact is the fathers love more to their daughters than their sons due to opposite attraction of the gender. but better talk to your mother first because she can convince your father to change his behaviour towards you and it would be much easy for your mother to discuss to the certain issues that you might can not talk about. the other thing is that you should consider this fact also that he does not stop you from your main activities such as you are doing job and doing whatever you like. but believe me my father even does not allow me to hang out with my friends and all that. yet i am unable to work even because he does not trust the job environments and he always argue that you do not know anything and all that. so it can be observed that your situation is not that weird rather he is just pampering you as a child but not interfering your life. so show some patience that would definitely help you out and keep on doing your work. another important thing that you want to marry just to get rid of your father might again would result into a hasty marriage decision so do not make any decisions in frustration and irritation. I am not saying that dont marry well if u have a better option than go for it but if you do not have a reasonable person than do not plan to marry just for sake of getting off from your house. you are just 21 and have so much to look out and enjoy life. Allah would help you out InshahAllah just have faith in Allah and obey your parents and discuss the things in case a problem comes. Sometimes it becomes the duty of the children to support their parents in resolving the issues rather enhancing them. so calm down and trust Allah..........
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