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Assalamu alaykum

 

 

I have relatives (aunt,uncle,cousins) who are very abnormally jealous of my family and especially me. They have come to America about 3 years ago from a poor country and while they lived there, my father had been their main source of income. (my father would send them money) Well their mother and father always command that their children have to measure up to me if not try to be better(academically, looks wise etc) its very sad but true and I have been always nice with them nonetheless but their actions toward my family has been the same nonetheless, my father supports them still financially by giving the jobs etc and being very kind with them but they still have a hatred for us inside their hearts. When we need their help, they are never there for us but they always call and ask they can come over our house every once in a blue moon when they get bored or hungry at their house (they fight a lot and they cant afford to eat nice foodz) they are a very large family and they are constantly backbiting against me and my fam etc. My parents and my other relatives have a very bad habit about telling people about how good my grades are and how much I know about Islam, etc. my aunt and my cousins copy every single thing i wear, my personal intersts/hobbies, it may sound weird but the way i talk, whatever i like EVERYTHIG you would be amazed...and at the same time they have such a bacd attitude with me and they talk bad about me It all started the summer when I was 12, my dad made me read the articles I has written in a fam get to gether infront of all my cousins (who were late teens) and uncle sitting outside and they were giving me evil stares so i told my dad i really didnt want to anymore so he told me to go inside and help with the dishes and so i did.

 

To be continued.......

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That summer, from them on was one of the worst sumemrs of my life. I developed a very sudden disease where I stopped eating food and whenever someone forced me to try i would try but burst into tears and start shaking all over, throw the food, scream and run to my room and lock it. my father took me to an imam, from doctor to doctor but nothing worked. I lost over 35 lbs. and I was thin to begin with so I was a mere skeleton and i almost died...my father when things got very out of hand started reciting alat ul kursi on me every night and it miraculously worked after about a week or so and i started to eat little by little...a year passed and i was still struggling but still OK ...then I turned 14 and i was as a freshman a high honor student and i played varsitysoccer, i always prayed, but all of a sudden everything went away from me. In the mornings when I would try to get up for school I would feel extremely and unusually tired so much that I would sleep for as long as 15- 16 hours and missing school became a very important issue for me. Before I would get straight A's and I was a high-honor student but allof a sudden my grades became F's due to my inability to concentrate, bad attendance, extreme tiredness and sleepiness. I felt as if I was slowly dying and melting away. I couldn't help it at all. My parents were raged at me, I cannot describe into words how upset both were with me.

 

Continued.............

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They didn't know what was happeneing and assumed I just became careless when in fact, I felt at the time as if I wanted to burst into tears and explain to them but I just didn't know how and so I would lock myself up in my room everysinglye day in complete isolation 24 hrs. Before, I would pray even tahajud but then I just didn't have the ability to pray let alone do anything else. My dad took me to the doctor to test my blood for any mineral deficiencies (i.e. iron) but the results were fine. Those few months that the problem was at its peakest, was when my mother was away on vacation overseas and my aunt was in charge of the house. My dad is always at work in the day and so I would be alone with her a lot. She is very weird because she always prays and reads Qur'an but her eyes are very scary and she has very bad habits of backbiting and putting other people into fights and whenever she sees me she cant take her eyes off me!!!! It has been a year now and Alhamdullilah things are a lot better than before but I am still struggling. I am forced to see a psychiatrist and he is of some help but not a lot. I pray to Allah subhana wa ta’la to help me and please tell me what I can do to be normal and happy again I do not know what is happeneing to me but i have heard maybe it is hassad or envy as that is very common unfortunately in my case. I want to ask thought is it true that someone else’s envy toward you can cause someone so much harm? I apologize for my post being very long and for grammar, spelling mistakes because it was too long to check over, and yeh thank u very much for reading it and replying

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btw, I havn't ever posted in this forum before and i'm using the forum's anon. username so plz dun get me confused with the otehr people who used this also

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Assalamu walikum sister,

 

Its really sad to hear that your own family members can be so jaelous and envious of you. Envy is very dangerous, I kinda think it eats away at the heart, so one cannot even well-wish another again! I am really sorry to hear how much you have been through. It must have been real tough. Insha'Allah you're in the best state of health now. I'll make dua for you that you continue to strengthen and florish, Insha'Allah.

I have come across something similar to you, although not that extreme. My Aunt (Paternal uncle's wife) was also very envious of us as we reside in the UK whereas they are back in our native country. Whenever we used to go she used to use the fact that we were from the UK against us. She had her bad points, but she also had some good, and we were able to live it out, even though it were tough. I am sure if that were possible with you then you would have done it long before, no need for me to suggest it!

 

Before you had the eating disorder, were you ever depressed? Or even overly stressed? I know that kinda thing can lead to all sorts of problems. Maybe you were thinking too much of things that were going on in your life at the time? The only advice I can give you is, ignore your family members whom envy you, let them be. Try and avoid showing them things you have done or have achieved, they make think you're doing it to make them jealous. Some people take it the wrong way totally.

I'm not sure on the point where someone else's envy can affect you life. I just thought it affected the individual whom was envious.

Recite Ayat al-Kursi and Insha'Allah you will be protected from all evils.

 

I am sorry if I have been no or little help to you. I am just struggling to take in all that you have gone through. All I can say is, I will make dua that your life becomes easier and you be happy in life, Insha'Allah. :D

 

Take care.

With all my duas'

Assalamu walikum,

Your muslim sis.

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salaam

 

Sister, sorry to hear about your difficulties, insa'Allah things will get better...

 

It looks as though you are suffering from the unseen and likely to be the al-ayn (the evil eye), this happens when people envy you

 

There is number of things which you can do, the most obvious is to perform ruqya (recite verse's of the quran)....The following verse's are effective: sura fatiha, sura baqaraa 1-5, 255 and 285-286)....also 109, 112, 113 and 114...This will weaken the effect of the unseen...Also recite the entire sura baqraa regularly this will benefit you a great deal..

 

The following dua is highly recommended:

A’oodhu bi kalimaat-illaah il-taammati min sharri ma khalaqa (I seek refuge in the perfect words of Allaah from the evil of that which He has created).

 

Also truffles, are a form of manna (mann) and their water is a cure for the eye..also eating dates is also good

 

If you know the person who envied you it can be treated very quickly, but often it is difficult to know who the exact person is....Anyway try the following link it will help:

 

"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=45659&dgn=4"]you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=q...&QR=45659&dgn=4[/url]

 

Insa'Allah I will remember you in my duas, I hope you recover fully quickly...

 

ma sallam

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:D

 

I've read everything.. dont want to jump to conclusions but it sounds a lot like jealousy, envy, "evil-eye" and yes this can have very negative effects on the mind and body.

 

I empathize with you :D and I can somewhat understand your situation since we have such relatives also but anywayz..

 

I've found some information on hasad and how to combat it.. I hope it helps you out.

 

"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_forums.gawaher(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/index.php?showtopic=10336"]you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_forums.gawaher(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/index.php?showtopic=10336[/url]

 

:D

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salaam

 

Sister the following is a comprehensive article on Hasad (envy), Jealousy and so on....I recommend it highly:

 

"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_www.angelfire(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/mo2/scarves/hasad.html"]you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_www.angelfire(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/mo2/scarves/hasad.html[/url]

 

ma sallam

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I will pray for Allah to reward you for being the first to understand and for helping me

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:D

 

Dear sister, Its sounds to me as though all the pressure from your family and their negativity towards you has had some dire effects on you. I honestly think that being around so much negative energy from these people is really hurting you, and yes I think their envy, evil eye, or whatever you want to call it seems to be working. I am glad to hear things are getting better. My advice to you would be to recite surah al ikhlas three times, then surah al falaq three times, then surah an nas three times followed by ayaltul kursi. I do this every night before I sleep, and insha Allah it will help you, also try to be in a state of wudu as much as you can. The people who were tried the most were those closest to Allah ta'ala, just look at Prophet Muhammad sallalahu alaihi wasalam, the most beloved of Allah, the best of creation, he had so many trials and afflications. Try to have patience through this very difficult time, don't ever loose faith in the ability of Allah hu ta'ala to help you. I think that going to the psychiatrist is good also, you need to talk out how this is affecting you so you can understand yourself better, and hopefully you will be stronger for it.

take care sister.

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