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Would you?  

21 members have voted

  1. 1. Would you Kill or Disown your child if they commited a huge crime

    • Kill them
      0
    • Disown them for life
      1
    • Forgive them and leave it up to Allah to judge their punishment
      20


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:sl: my fellow brothers and sisters. Every morning I watch the news and today I seen, well read something unusual.

A Jordan father shot her 17 yr old daughter for the sake of family honour. Allah Al-Alim the/All-Knower knows for what reason

If you were a parent and your child had done something to ruin or in other words destroy the family name, would you kill them, disown them, or actually forgive them and leave it up to Allah SWT[using large font size is not allowed]

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PropellerAds

I chose forgive becouse I would neither kill or disown. However, I would only forgive if they repented. Insisting on the crime is not acceptable.

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:sl:

 

I agree with sis Mahawi.

 

"Let not those among you who are endued with grace and amplitude of means resolve by oath against helping their kinsmen, those in want, and those who have left their homes in Allah's cause: let them forgive and overlook, do you not wish that Allah should forgive you? For Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." [surat an-Noor, Verse 22]

 

:sl:

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Peace

 

this kind of thing seems to be really widespread in countries such as pakistan and some arab states. Frequently, families kill their daughters if they are found guilty of fornication which is totally barbaric, cruel and unislamic.

 

 

f you were a parent and your child had done something to ruin or in other words destroy the family name, would you kill them, disown them, or actually forgive them and leave it up to Allah SWT

 

Define "something"

 

Salaams

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Assalamualaikum, I would forgive them first and explain to them how the consequences of their actions have effected them and the family, and then the Ummah.

 

If I have taught my children Islamic values when they are young, inshaAllah hopefully they will not commit any major Sins when they are older. If they do something that has caused harm to someone else, I cannot forgive them, it is the person or family that has been effected that has to forgive them. If their action dishonour me and the family, I will forgive them, not once, not twice, but as many times as it takes, because at the end of my life I will be in need of forgiveness from The Greatest Forgiver, What would hapen to me if he decides not to Forgive me on that Day.

 

Here is my daughter umEesaa's signature on her profile on the forum "

"Try to forgive others, though it may be hard. After all Allah Ta'aalah is the Greatest, what if He, Na'oozubillah, decides not to forgive us?"

Ammar Bhai (unpublised book)

 

 

As far as te Family honour is concerned, this is something that is there in all cultures, not just Arab, Pakistani in fact not just Muslim... and has nothing to do with Islam. Living in India, where there as many Religions as can be seen, I have seen and heard of many different things people do when their honour has been challanged. It is Allah who gives Honour or disgraces a person.

 

Assalamu alaikum, umAhmad.

Edited by umAhmad

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:j:

I must say aunty umAhmad (by way how are you, :) you are great...:) I missed you :sl: :sl: ) you summerized it up pretty well especially with saying..."It is Allah who gives Honour or disgraces a person"

May Allah SWT guide us and protect us from shaytans evil whispers and actions

 

I myself would forgive my child and discuss with them their concequences for their action. Having good knowledge in deen is important

things are certain things the younger Ummah need to be aware of

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:)

 

Alhumdulilah Aunty has covered wonderfully what I would do. :sl:

 

I would inshallah teach my child the Islamic concepts from a very young age,make it fun to learn and inshallah teach it so he/she loves it. :)

 

Alhumdulilah my heart is always open for forgiving others,remember the wonderful Prophet,as that shows good character,and character is what will be weighed the most on judgement day.

 

Having good knowledge in deen is important

things are certain things the younger Ummah need to be aware of

 

Very well said Mina sis. :sl:

 

:j:

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Asalam alikum,

I think we have to look at Islam for this, this is not our own jusgement or decision, who ask you to forgive or disown if your child do zina? Can someone plz tell me what is punishment of zina in Islam? or we are following something else here

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Assalamualaikum, I would forgive them first and explain to them how the consequences of their actions have effected them and the family, and then the Ummah.

 

If I have taught my children Islamic values when they are young, inshaAllah hopefully they will not commit any major Sins when they are older. If they do something that has caused harm to someone else, I cannot forgive them, it is the person or family that has been effected that has to forgive them. If their action dishonour me and the family, I will forgive them, not once, not twice, but as many times as it takes, because at the end of my life I will be in need of forgiveness from The Greatest Forgiver, What would hapen to me if he decides not to Forgive me on that Day.

 

Here is my daughter umEesaa's signature on her profile on the forum "

"Try to forgive others, though it may be hard. After all Allah Ta'aalah is the Greatest, what if He, Na'oozubillah, decides not to forgive us?"

Ammar Bhai (unpublised book)

As far as te Family honour is concerned, this is something that is there in all cultures, not just Arab, Pakistani in fact not just Muslim... and has nothing to do with Islam. Living in India, where there as many Religions as can be seen, I have seen and heard of many different things people do when their honour has been challanged. It is Allah who gives Honour or disgraces a person.

 

Assalamu alaikum, umAhmad.

 

:sl:

 

MashaAllah such a beautiful philosophy. I have nothing further to add.

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In this case, it's zina/fornication

 

In this case we should not even think about killing our children because we would probably go to hell...and its ILLEGAL in Islam to kill people just because they have insulted your "honor". Unless your kids are married and they cheat on their spouse, there is no death penalty, so why did you even put it in the poll? It would be a huge huge huge sin to kill them for fornication.

 

I do not understand the arab culture's moral idol known as "honor". Just because your children have done something wrong doesn't make you evil. what kind of muslims would think less of their neighbours just because their kids made a mistake? very, very unislamic. And secondly, how would the neighbours know about zina? as far as I know 4 witnesses are required to proove zina, so unless the kids did it in public how could they be caught?

 

Salaams

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I do not understand the arab culture's moral idol known as "honor".

:sl:

It's not just in the arab culture.

 

Does anyone notice a possible loop hole here?

Brother kills sister with the instruction of parents > parents forgive the son > no legal case, son is free.

This falls under the category of homicide in Islamic law, where there are two options to the punishment.

 

:sl:

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as far as I know 4 witnesses are required to proove zina, so unless the kids did it in public how could they be caught?

:sl:

..medical test..the girl conceiving before marriage...etc.

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Peace

 

..medical test..the girl conceiving before marriage...etc.

 

And how could a medical test be conducted if there are not 4 witnesses to testify to the sex? What, are the parents just gonna go "well susan we heard u had sex so come with us for a medical test". thats wrong.

 

Also about the pregnancy , the penalty is 100 lashes and I heard that some scholars believe that's not a valid proof of zina, maybe it was artificial insemination etc etc.

 

I ask again...why is the murder option in this poll? If we are talking about fornication, people should never even think of the killing, but they do. that tells u something about the culture of some people, where they kill innocent people. I hope all those "honor killings" people get full justice from Allah(SWT) for their murder.

 

 

Salaams

Edited by anthony19832005

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..medical test..the girl conceiving before marriage...etc.
Up to my understanding, the medical test or pregnancy is not proof enough to do the hadd of zina. You need either 4 eye witnesses or 4 confessions. I heard a scholar on TV, if someone has references it would be useful to post them.

 

 

I do not understand the arab culture's moral idol known as "honor"

 

That's pre-Islamic tradition, it's being fought very toughly by scholars and more educated people, but ignorance is no help in this area. Plus, it is very common in many non-Arab states too and not just muslims.

 

However, although this particualr type of honor is what you find the media focusing on; but to Arabs honor is much more than that, as it is to many cultures I suppose.

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:sl:

..medical test..the girl conceiving before marriage...etc.

:sl:

 

This could be due to other reasons e.g. rape. It is not a definitive proof of willful fornication.

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Peace

 

Up to my understanding, the medical test or pregnancy is not proof enough to do the hadd of zina. You need either 4 eye witnesses or 4 confessions. I heard a scholar on TV, if someone has references it would be useful to post them.

 

Yes thats what I heard too.

 

Salaams

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And how could a medical test be conducted if there are not 4 witnesses to testify to the sex? What, are the parents just gonna go "well susan we heard u had sex so come with us for a medical test". thats wrong.

:sl:

 

4 witnesses are required for hadd punishment. If there are other evidence, like reliable medical test, etc, then the judge can carry out ta'zir punishment.

 

If the committer of the crime confesses, then the hadd punishment applies.

 

:sl:

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This is very common among Hindus too in India.

 

Both men & women are victims of it... if a guy commits zina then the brother of the girl does take revenge on the guy.

 

What would most of us do to such a guy? Say it's ok kid or take some action.

 

And honor killing most of the time is not premeditated & is mostly a passion crime. Ppl can't handle that such a huge trust has been broken & goto punish the culprit in the rage of the moment. Most stop after some brutal beatin & then some don't... n they person is killed.

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:sl:

 

From what I know, you do need 4 shaheeds to prove zina so I gues brother anthony already mentioned this. I haven't read more into this issue because it was never mentioned last night on the news and I havent read the newspaper lately but :sl: I'm going to try to find out. & I wanted to add more to this conversation. The other day another issue like this came up, an Iraqi girl was about to be prosecuted for killing her rapist, was this a right decision the Iraqi gov't was about to do?

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Salaam,

 

I chose forgive, because I'm not one to judge or kill my child. Especially disown?

But then I come from the US so it sounds plain crazy-talk to me :sl:

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:sl:

 

 

I used to think I'd kill but then I read that apparently it's haraam to do so... Therefore, I wouldn't actually kill [if I am able to keep control of myself] but maybe something really harsh. Or something...

 

You can't actually disown a child... I mean you can disown a boy but not a girl. [still hard]

 

However, i know I am saying this since I am not able to feelt he love that I would have for my child etc, cause I don't have any as yet...

 

May Allah never put us in any such cirumstance where we might have to make such a choice...

 

Allah knows best.

 

w/salaam

Edited by noxiouspython

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Peace

 

I used to think I'd kill but then I read that apparently it's haraam to do so... Therefore, I wouldn't actually kill [if I am able to keep control of myself]

 

"Apparently" its haraam to kill your child just because he had premarital sex? APPARENTLY? Brother, you must be talking about different scenarios not just fornication ...right? Who in their right mind would even contemplate killing their son or daughter for premarital sex...

 

Salaams

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:sl:

 

Peace

"Apparently" its haraam to kill your child just because he had premarital sex? APPARENTLY? Brother, you must be talking about different scenarios not just fornication ...right? Who in their right mind would even contemplate killing their son or daughter for premarital sex...

 

Salaams

 

 

Well... I was actually thinking on the lines of... well I think it's the cultural difference. Where i come from it would be like a massive issue. So... thats about it...

 

An example, apparently there are people who would not divorce thier wives if they found them cheating but first warn them or something... Now that, in my view, is insane! but then again that is my view... I personally think, as someone put it, i'd go 'medieval' on her'. If it wasn't haraam to kill her, I would go all 'hannibal lector' on her...

 

w/salaam

Edited by noxiouspython

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Even if it was my daughter, I would carry on according to Islamic rulings.

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