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Question about love

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assamalaikum brothers and sisters.

 

i typed "islamic forums" in "you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_www.google(contact admin if its a beneficial link)"]google[/url], and this site was the first result. i would just like to say thank you to the creator of this forum, i think it will be very convenient and helpful to me.

 

however, that is not why i'm here. i have a rather strange question that i hope won't raise eyebrows too much. this is a rather long story, and i apologize for that, but please bare with me.

 

so, the situation is that i had always intended on becoming religious, but after marriage. however, something happened to me 3 weeks ago that made me rush to learn how to pray and ask Allah to help me; my significant other, whom i loved very much, decided to let me go. i say 'significant other' and not 'girlfriend' because we considered ourselves just that- we knew from the day we met we would get married. because of a mistake i made in the past, she felt she could no longer be with me. this devastated me, and i turned to Allah in hoping and praying he would help, because i didn't know what else to do.

 

anyways, my question is this.. if i cannot be with her in this life, will i be able to be with her in the next life(janat)? even if i have to marry someone else and she marries someone else in this life? this is the only hope i have, and its the only thing thats keeping me going. a friend of mine told me whoever you marry in this life, you will be with them for eternity in heaven. is there any truth to this? what about those who are married and are not as happy as they can be? any input would be greatly appreciated, thanks. Assalamu alaikum.

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PropellerAds

As-salamu alaikum.

Its true that whoever you are married to in this world, you will be with them in the next world.

If she marries someone else, she'll be with him in the next world.

As for people who are married and not happy about it, theyll be in the next world with their partners. If it Jannah, then there wont be any unhappinesses or ill feelings between the husband and wife there.

If both of you leave tis world without marrying someone, then ??????? Allah knows best.

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Brother your post made me :D

May Allah(swt) give you the strength to move on and find someone who you will love and who will love you in return the same way............ameen..........

.......

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As-salamu alaikum.

Its true that whoever you are married to in this world, you will be with them in the next world.

If she marries someone else, she'll be with him in the next world.

As for people who are married and not happy about it, theyll be in the next world with their partners. If it Jannah, then there wont be any unhappinesses or ill feelings between the husband and wife there.

If both of you leave tis world without marrying someone, then ??????? Allah knows best.

 

Asalaamualaikum

 

please can you provide a source to this information?

 

jazakhallah

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Brother your post made me :P

May Allah(swt) give you the strength to move on and find someone who you will love and who will love you in return the same way............ameen..........

.......

 

assamalaikum sister,

 

i'm sorry my post made you sad, that was not my intent :D .. everyone says the same thing, and they say 'dont worry, you'll get over it and find someone else'- i know many in my situation have said it, but i mean it when i say i dont want to find someone else. i even made a decision that if it would not work out, i would perhaps not get married at all, but then hurting my parents would be the dilemma. thank you for your kind prayer, though :D.

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Walaikum Asalaam,

 

Having such thoughts, or thinking you feel that way is only making your own life a misery. Can't you see?

 

How do you think your wife/husband in this Dunya will feel when you tell them you're in love with someone else and want to be with them only in the next life? What a great way to start a marriage(!)

 

If you weren't married to the person, then you cannot be in love with them, simple as that. True love cannot exist outside marriage, full stop. Why do people fool themselves into thinking that it does? Women only fall in love once in their lifetime, and ONLY after Marriage.. men obviously more since they're allowed to marry more than once.

 

You'll get over it. You WILL, trust me.. eventually.

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''Love doesn't exist.. it's just an emotional response from two confused idiots.'' - A friend's msn nickname, LOL!

 

(Not intended at the topic ceator or anyone else, I just found it funny).

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Walaikum Asalaam,

 

Having such thoughts, or thinking you feel that way is only making your own life a misery. Can't you see?

 

How do you think your wife/husband in this Dunya will feel when you tell them you're in love with someone else and want to be with them only in the next life? What a great way to start a marriage(!)

 

If you weren't married to the person, then you cannot be in love with them, simple as that. True love cannot exist outside marriage, full stop. Why do people fool themselves into thinking that it does? Women only fall in love once in their lifetime, and ONLY after Marriage.. men obviously more since they're allowed to marry more than once.

 

You'll get over it. You WILL, trust me.. eventually.

 

salam,

thanks for your advice- but can you please answer my question- will you necessarily have to end up with the person you married in janat?

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Salaam alaykum,

 

This should answer your question:

 

Question :

 

 

A question that we hear often is with regards to men and women in the Hereafter; can you tell us something (according to Quran and Sunnah) regarding where the women will be with respect to their husbands. In other words, will a woman be with her husband in Jannah? Will he/she or both have a choice as to whether or not they want to be together?

Wa Jazaakumullaahu Khairan

 

Answer :

 

Praise be to Allaah.

 

1.Yes, a woman will be with her husband in Paradise, and even with her children, sons and daughters, if they are Muslim. This is indicated by the aayah (interpretation of the meaning):

 

“And those who believe and whose offspring follow them in Faith, - to them shall We join their offspring, and We shall not decrease the reward of their deeds in anything.� [al-Toor 52:21]

 

It is also indicated by the du’aa’ of the angels who carry the Throne:

 

“Our Lord! And make them enter the ‘Adn (Eden) Paradise (everlasting Gardens) which you have promised them  and to the righteous among their fathers, their wives, and their offspring! Verily, You are the All-Mighty, the All-Wise� [Ghaafir 40:8 – interpretation of the meaning]

 

Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

 

“(This means) bring them together so that they may find delight in one another in neighbouring dwellings. This is like the aayah (interpretation of the meaning):

 

‘And those who believe and whose offspring follow them in Faith, - to them shall We join their offspring, and We shall not decrease the reward of their deeds in anything.’ [al-Toor 52:21] This means: We shall make them all equal in status so that they may find joy. This will not be by lowering the one who is higher in status until he is equal with the one who is lower; on the contrary, We shall raise the one who is lacking in good deeds and make them equal, as a bounty and a blessing from Us. Sa’eed ibn Jubair said: when the believer enters Paradise, he will ask about his father, son and brother and where they are. It will be said to him, they did not reach the same level of good deeds as you did. He will say, But I only strove for my sake and for theirs. Then they will be brought to join him on the level where he is.�

 

(Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 4/73)

 

2. We do not think that anyone who Allaah has decreed will enter Paradise and have all trace of hatred taken away from them will choose to be separated from a loved one when he or she meets them in the Hereafter.

 

3. If a woman does not get married in this world, Allaah will grant her a spouse in whom she will find delight in Paradise. The joys of Paradise are not limited only to males – they are for males and females alike, and part of that joy is marriage.�

 

(Majmoo’ Fataawaa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, 2/53), There will be no single people in Paradise.

 

And Allaah knows best.

 

 

 

Islam Q&A

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

 

 

I want add though that your post made me sad cause it shows that you make this girl your priority.... if she has made it clear to you that there is no way she'll marry you then please dont torture yourself any longer and do your best to move on, everyone knows it's not easy but try to make an effort, we only get one life and it's not wise to let our emotions run our lives, it clouds our minds, whenever a girl and guy are together, shaytaan is the third party and he does his best to make trouble between them and he'll try to make you think things that aren't really there, make things seems more beautiful than they really are or cause doubts about eachother in their hearts, whatever will work for them to have problems....with this way of thinking "i won't marry anyone else and just wait to be with her in jannah" you're giving into shaytaan. Often we'll do things that make life on us so hard when we dont really have to, there is a simpler way of life and much soothing and calming for the heart and that is to just put your trust in Allah, you're going through this for a reason, we all get tests in life, what matters is what we do with them....so you love this girl but for the moment it seems it's not meant to be, then start doing things that will make you feel good about yourself and will calm your heart, you dont have to do something big and drastic, start with little steps in trying to please Allah and you'll see that in time you will feel better, pleasing Allah should always come first than pleasing any person or to follow your desire because thats what you're doing at the moment....your heart desires her while Allah is showing you she's not for you right now(who knows what the future will bring???) just surrender yourself to the Will of Allah because it's useless going against it, you'll only hurt yourself....and it hurts me just knowing you're out there in such pain and you dont seem to be thinking clearly, so i hope that you will think about what everyone here said and choose for your own sanity and safety of your heart...this is life, and life is beautiful, we are blessed with so many things but we people have such a big tendency to focus mainly on the negative...you'll feel better when you choose to feel better, believe me!

I hope it's ok to post another article here below, i just thought it might help you and others in the same situation, as i'm sure there are many! Take good care of yourself...

 

wa Salaam.

 

Some Words to Heal the Broken Heart

 

Shaykh ul-Islaam ibn Taymiyyah rahimahullaah

 

 

 

As for the sickness of desire and passionate love then this is the soul loving that which would harm it coupled with this is a hatred of that which would benefit it.

 

Passionate love is a psychological sickness, and when it’s effects become noticeable on the body, it becomes a sickness that afflicts the mind also. Either by afflicting the mind by the likeness of melancholy, or afflicting the body through weakness and emancipation. But the purpose here is to discuss its effect on the heart, for passionate love is the fundament that makes the soul covet that which would harm it, similar to the one weak of body who covets that which harms it, and if he is not satiated by that then he is grieved, and if he is satiated then his sickness increases. The same applies to the heart afflicted with this love, for it is harmed by its connection to the loved, either by seeing, hearing, touching or even thinking about it. And if he were to curb the love then the heart is hurt and grieved by this, and if he gives in to the desire then the sickness becomes stronger and becomes a means through which the grievance is increased.

 

In the hadeeth concerning the saying of Moosa reported by Wahb*, which is recorded by Imam Ahmad in az-Zuhd:

 

Allah says: Indeed I drive away My friends from the delights of this world and its opulence and comfort just as the compassionate shepherd drives away his camel from the dangerous grazing lands. And indeed I make them avoid its tranquility and livelihood, just as the compassionate shepherd makes his camel to avoid the resting placers wherein it would be easy prey. This is not because I consider them to be insignificant, but so they may complete their portion of My kindness in safety and abundance, the delights of the world will not attract him and neither would desires overcome him.

 

*Wahb ibn Munabbih is a noble taabi’ee, but this hadeeth is reported from him directly to the Prophet (saaw) and is not authentic.

 

Therefore the only cure for the sick lies in his removing the sickness by removing this blameworthy love from his heart.

 

There are some whose hearts contain the disease of desire and whose perceptions are only skin deep. When the object of the desire submits, the sickness is satiated, and this satiation strengthens the desire and pursuit of the object and hence strengthens the sickness. This is in contrast to the one whose objective is not met, for this failure results in the removing the satiation that would strengthen the sickness and thereby the desire is weakened, as is the love. This is because the person definitely intends that there be action accompanying his desire, for otherwise all his desire would be is just whisperings of the soul, unless there is some speech or looking accompanying this.

 

As for the one who sis afflicted with this passionate love but holds back and is patient, then indeed Allah will reward him for his taqwa as occurs in the hadeeth:

 

That the one who passionately loves someone yet holds back, conceals this and is patient, then dies upon this, will be a martyr.

 

(A da’eef hadeeth . refer to the discussion concerning its authenticity in al-Jawaab al-Kaafee and Rawdha al-Muhibbeen of Ibn al Qayyim and Silsilah ad-Da’eefah of al-Albaanee.)

 

This hadeeth is known to be the report of Yahya al-Qataat from Mujaahid from Ibn Abbas from the Prophet (saaw) but it is problematic and such a hadeeth is not to be depended upon.

 

But it is known from the evidences of the Shareeah that if one were to hold back from performing that which is unlawful, be it looking, speaking or acting, and he conceals this and does not articulate it so as not to fall into that which is prohibited and he is patient in his obedience to Allah and keeps away from disobedience to Allah, despite the pain that his heart feels due to this passionate love (similar to the case of the one who is patient through a calamity), then indeed this person would gain the same reward as those who have feared Allah and been patient.

 

Verily, he who fears Allah and is patient, then surely Allah makes not the reward of the doers good to be lost. [surah Yusuf: Ayah 90]

 

But as for him who feared the standing before his Lord, and restrained himself from impure evil desires and lusts. Verily, Paradise will be his abode. [surah an-Naaziaat: Ayah 40]

 

When the soul loves something, it will do all it can to attain it, so the one who does this out of having a blameworthy love or hatred then this action of his would be sinful. For example, his hating a person due to envying him and thereby harming whosoever is linked to that person.

 

As one poet affected by this said:

 

For the sake of a Sudanese girl he loved Sudan to the point that he loved the black dogs due to his love of her.

 

Ibn al Qayyim al Jawziyyah’s al Fawaaid (p111-112)

 

“The slave is not afflicted with a punishment greater in severity then the hardening of the heart and being distant from Allah. For the Fire was created to melt the hardened heart. The most distant heart from Allah is the heart which is hardened. If the heart becomes hardened, the eye becomes dry.

 

If four matters are exceeded in quantity, beyond what is necessary, the heart shall become hardened:

 

Food, sleep, speech and sexual intercourse. A body afflicted by disease does not derive nourishment from food or water, similarly a heart diseased by desire does not benefit from admonishment and exhortation.

 

Whosoever desires to purify his heart, then let him prefer Allah to his desires.

 

The heart which is clinging to its desires is veiled from Allah, commensurate to the degree that it is attached to them, the hearts are the vessels of Allah upon his earth, hence the most beloved of them to him, are the ones most compassionate, pure and resistant to deviation.

 

They (the transgressors) preoccupied their hearts [in the pursuance] of the Dunya, would that they preoccupied them with Allah and the hereafter, then surely they would have reflected upon the intended meaning of his poignant words and verses. Their hearts would have returned to their masters with wisdom, marvelously curious and [in possession] of the rarest of precious gems.

 

If the heart is nourished with remembrance, its thirst quenched with contemplation and cleansed from corruption, it shall witness remarkable and wondrous matters, inspiring wisdom.

 

Not every individual who is endowed with knowledge and wisdom, and assumes its character is form amongst its people. Rather the people of knowledge and wisdom are those who infused life into their hearts by slaying their desires. As for the one who slays his heart and vitalized his desires, then knowledge and wisdom is naked upon his tongue.

 

The destruction of the heart occurs by security [in this Dunya] and negligence, its fortification occurs by fear and remembrance. If the heart renounces the pleasures of the Dunya, it settles upon the [pursuance of] pleasures of the Hereafter, and amongst those who call towards it.

 

Should the heart become content with the pleasures of the Dunya, those pleasures [of the hereafter] cease [to continue].

 

Yearning for Allah and his meeting is like the gentle breeze blowing upon the heart, extinguishing the blaze of the Dunya. Whosoever caused his heart to settle with his Lord shall be in a state, clam and tranquil, and whosoever sent it amongst the people shall be disturbed and excessively perturbed.

 

For the love of Allah shall not enter a heart, which contains the love of this world, except as a camel, which passes through the eye of a needle.

 

Hence, the most beloved servant before Allah is the one whom He places in His servitude, whom He selects for His love, whom He causes to purify his worship for Him, dedicates his objectives for Him, his tongue for His remembrance, and his limbs for His service.

 

The heart becomes sick, as the body becomes sick, and its remedy is al-Tawbah and protection [from transgression].

 

It becomes rusty as a mirror becomes rusty, and its clarity is obtained by remembrance. It becomes naked as the body becomes naked, and its beautification is at-Taqwa. It becomes hungry and thirsty as the body becomes hungry and thirst, and its food and drink are knowledge, love, dependence, repentance and servitude.�

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assamalaikum Noor,

 

thanks for your reply and kind words. she didn't exactly say she could never love me, in fact, when i asked her if she still loved me, she said she wouldn't answer. she also said that "everything happens for a reason, and that if we're destined to be togher, we will". ultimately, i care about her happiness more than mine- i just believe that i'm the one who'd be able to keep her most happy; simply because i would never take her for granted, and i promised Allah(swt) that if he returned her to me, i would show my affection and love her even more.

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I dont know more about janat. As I know, in the heaven, someone can meet who him/her love in the world, like wife or husband. About "pre" wife, I dont know more. May be you can meet her in the heaven, cause you and her will be marriage. Sorry I dont know more about that. May Allah give me apology about some mistake from my thaught. Allahu a'lam bish showab.

 

But, something you must do and do more is praying ('ubudiyah), like sholat, work, helping a people, etc... So you can go to the heaven and having fun there. Keep your faith, bro! Keep optimist and love forever to Allah.

 

Aditya Kurnia

(that is romantic bro, if you want to call me contact to aditya_kurnia[at]yahoo)

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salaam bro Cobra

 

i guess i'm too young to see anything much in this. but i don't see what pulls you to like a person sooooooooo much. what if you get rejected, it seems like you'd be very hurt becuase your so optimistic and hopeful of the outcome while she's either brushing off answers that don;t seem to be whole or fully decided upon because she isn't even sure weather she likes you that much or not?

 

what's she waiting for?

why are you waiting for her?

why do you wan't to be with her in heaven for? is it really the most important thing?

 

:P :D :D :P

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assamalaikum brothers and sisters.

 

i typed "islamic forums" in google, and this site was the first result. i would just like to say thank you to the creator of this forum, i think it will be very convenient and helpful to me.

 

however, that is not why i'm here. i have a rather strange question that i hope won't raise eyebrows too much. this is a rather long story, and i apologize for that, but please bare with me.

 

so, the situation is that i had always intended on becoming religious, but after marriage. however, something happened to me 3 weeks ago that made me rush to learn how to pray and ask Allah to help me; my significant other, whom i loved very much, decided to let me go. i say 'significant other' and not 'girlfriend' because we considered ourselves just that- we knew from the day we met we would get married. because of a mistake i made in the past, she felt she could no longer be with me. this devastated me, and i turned to Allah in hoping and praying he would help, because i didn't know what else to do.

 

anyways, my question is this.. if i cannot be with her in this life, will i be able to be with her in the next life(janat)?

 

Asalamu Alaykum

 

I believe in jannah you can choose to either stay married to the person you were married to in this life or someone else. However, both parties must be in jannah, if she enters the hellfire then you will not be with her in paradise.

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nop

 

in jannah your wife of this world will be the queen of your 'hurs' over there - she will also be more beautiful then all of your 'hurs'

 

Allah knows best

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Salam Alaik

 

Brother Cobra, I feel very sorry to hear that.. She doesnt know how lucky she is for having you as her husband. Im too young to get involved in this matter. Maybe you will think that I dont understand your situation and maybe its true but let me try to let you know that you'r not alone.

 

Have you talk to her that you both are meant to be together? Women... Today they will say like this... And tomorrow they will say like that...

 

Maybe she doesnt realise that she can live without you.. Yeah..you know women.. Their hearts are very fragile and it takes a long time to calm their selves down. Feeling and emotions sometimes control their whole body and mind. Be patient bro because Allah always with those who strive for a goodness. :D

 

Did u know something? Whenever I sad, I tell my self : Sadness is not a sickness. Because it drives me closer to Allah.

 

Allah gives you the chance to love and know HIM better :D

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assamalaikum,

 

once again, thanks for the kind words brothers and sisters. the only way i could explain why i feel so strongly about her is that i just very strongly believe i will be able to keep her happier than anyone else, i promised myself and Allah(swt) that i would.

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Salaam alaykum,

 

That is exactly the problem! You have told yourself you're the only one in this entire world that can make her happy or that nobody else can make her happy like you can....that is what you WANT...it's your desire, it's not reality...i'm sorry to say it so harsh, sometimes we need to hear the truth in a harsh way because it prevents us from further troubles, insha Allah.

 

I really feel bad for you, you're not alone in this! Millions of people have gone through and are going through what you're experiencing...i know you badly want to be with her but like i said in my previous posts, it often happens that we picture things in our heads that are not true, you're deluding yourself in this preoccupation that you have with this girl. You are not the only one who can make her happy, i know you dont want to hear that but if you're truly looking our for HER happiness and not YOUR desire, then you have keep that in mind.

 

Give it a rest for a while so you can calm down a bit, try doing something completely unselfish for someone else so you're mind is on them and not this girl or yourself. If Allah wants it, you will marry this girl, be patient and have trust in Allah, He knows what is best for you and that girl...i'm sure you've heard that before and you probably are just thinking that you simply gotta have her but life is not about what you want....it's about surrendering yourself to Allah and pleasing Allah... after you die and you reach Jannah, insha Allah, that's when you get to relax and enjoy beautiful pleasures forever! Not here and not now... maybe the girl needs some rest too and get her thoughts in order( i hope you're not constantly contacting her cause that wouldnt be helping the situation either).

 

I hope i didn't offend you or hurt you with these words, i feel very concerned about this and just want to stop you and this girl from hurting more, i apologize if i hurt you!

 

Please take good care of yourself.

 

wa Salaam.

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AOA:

 

I hate it when people say, "you'll find someone else� I think it is the most insensitive thing a person can say to another who is in love with someone. So I won't say that. Instead this is what I think you should do:

 

Pray Saltul-Hadjat (if you don't know what that is, I will tell you but I'm sure you know) Pray to Allah that if this person is good for you and is meant for you, then to bring her to you with ease. Remove, whatever obstacles are in your path and to bring the two of you together in marriage. But if this person is not good for you then to remove whatever you feel for her from your heart. That's the best advice I can give you brother.

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assalamu alaikum

sorry to hear abt your problem...whatever you decide to do...never ever forget your creator...without him you would be nothing...AT ALL

 

wasalaam

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AOA:

 

I hate it when people say, "you'll find someone elseâ€? I think it is the most insensitive thing a person can say to another who is in love with someone.  So I won't say that.  Instead this is what I think you should do:

 

Pray Saltul-Hadjat (if you don't know what that is, I will tell you but I'm sure you know) Pray to Allah that if this person is good for you and is meant for you, then to bring her to you with ease.  Remove, whatever obstacles are in your path and to bring the two of you together in marriage.  But if this person is not good for you then to remove whatever you feel for her from your heart.  That's the best advice I can give you brother.

 

assamalaikum sister,

 

i'm glad i'm not the only one who doesn't like hearing "you'll find someone else" here :D. i do not know what saltul-hadjat is.. can you please help me?

 

Assalamu alaikum

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:D

 

Paradise, Janat...heaven... well whatever u call it, its a place where Allah has promised us in His holy book that we'll live there forever in happiness. Now if u think if u coudn't marry this sister and weren't able to meet her in the Heaven either, it will be very sad life for u... u forget that in Janat one will have no sad feelings, envy or any kind of worries. We'll live the life our minds can't imagine. so ur being worried about the heaven and not meeting her..... i think u should take it out of ur mind. Inshallah you and we all muslims who will enter Heaven :P :D will be pleased with their lives there, Undoubtedly!

 

I think sis Noor gave great advice! :D her both posts are wonderful and i would advice u to read them once again and thinkabout it :P be patient and pray to Allah.

 

it often happens that we picture things in our heads that are not true, you're deluding yourself in this preoccupation that you have with this girl. You are not the only one who can make her happy, i know you dont want to hear that but if you're truly looking out for HER happiness and not YOUR desire, then you have keep that in mind.

 

 

it might sound harsh, but do consider these points :D

 

strenght to u

Edited by Grace_of_Allah

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AOA:

 

Brother Cobra,

 

Here is what Salat-ul-Hajat is:

 

Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) mentions, 'Whoever has any need, then firstly, perform a proper Wudhu, thereafter perform 2 Rakaats Salaat.

Thereafter, commence your Du'aa by praising Allah and sending salutations upon Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam).

 

Recite the following Du'aa, 'Laa ilaaha illallaahul haleemul kareem.

Subhaanallaahu rabbil arshil adheem, alhamdulillaahi rabbil `aalameen.

As-aluka muwjibaat rahmatika, wa `adhaaima maghfiratika wal ghaneemat min

kulli birr was salaamat min kulli ithm, laa tada`a liy dhanban illaa

ghafaratah walaa hamman illaa farrajtah walaa haajatan hiya laka ridhan

illaa qadhaytahaa Yaa arhamar raahimeen' (Trans: There is no deity besides

Allah who is most tolerant and most noble. Glory be to Allah who is the Lord

of the majestic throne. All praises are for Allah, the lord of the Universe.

I am asking you O Allahto bestow upon me your mercy and forgiveness, grant

me piety and protection from all misfortunes. Do not leave any sin on me

except that you forgive me, relieve me from distress and difficulties and

fulfil all such needs of mine which you are pleased with - O Most Merciful

of those who show mercy) (Tirmidhi pg.108; Ashrafiyya)

 

After reciting this dua, ask Allah to fulfill your wish. Please ask him to grant it only if is good for you and your deen and if it will bring you happines. Why want something that will only cause you harm? Ask him if it is good for you and meant to be, bring it to you with ease.

 

Togetherwith performing this Salaat, one should always keep in mind that

help and assistance comes only from Allah Ta'ala. Allah grants to whomsoever

he wishes and withholds from whomsoever he wishes. If one's needs are not

fulfilled, do not ever become despondent in the mercy of Allah because Allah

is the most wise and know best the reason of withholding one's Du'aas and

needs.

 

Good luck.

Edited by Sofiaa

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Assalamualaykum Cobra,

I have recently been through the very same situation. I say recently cause it has taken me almost a year and a half to come out of it, and still at times when I am alone i get very deppressed. And guess what , I did exactly the same thing, Turned to Allah to seek refuge from this trauma. We seperated because of religious differences, She was a Hindu girl. Now I dont even have the hope of meeting her in my next life :D

Since the situation went out of my controll, she got married to somone else and I realised i cant do anything now. A great deppression came over me, and i tried my best to fight it. Had many psychiatric sessions, but no help. But I refused to give in and called Allah for help. And Help came, slowly but steadily.

I started praying more extensively, which automatically started attracting me towards other Things, like fasting, Charity, etc etc. Believe me two years back I could not have imagined myself the way I am today. And I am thankful to Allah that this Breakoff happened :D

My search for peace took me to harunYahya site, where I found his online book on LOVE. That did the rest. I realised that the pain I am feeling now is given by Allah and he is the only one who can remove it. It made me clear that What I call love is not Love but a satanic feeling. It is addictive, and True Love is very Pious, it cannot harm you, true love protects you. And true love is the Love for Allah, Which you cannot loose, ever, in this life or after. You wont feel heart broken, you wont feel deppressed. Instead every morning is a brand new day. Try falling in Love with Allah, and this entire world will Love you.

It makes no sense following things that will not last. Though I still miss her, feel bad about this whole episode. But the reason has changed. I feel I could have helped her in Understanding Islam. The time I got with her , I wasted it in Romancing. I miss that precious time.

But its never too late to start and to make up for our mistakes.

Pray more, the more you feel deppressed the more you pray. and within no time You will be feeling happy

 

All the best, This is just a testing phase. I pray you pass with great points

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AOA:

 

hamid2000: Wow, Mashallah what you said was beautiful. Makes sense to fall in love with Allah for you will never be disappointed and get a greater love in return.

 

Very nice.

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:P

 

Mashallah brother Hamid.... :D should i congratulate u?? :D lots of strenght to u and may Allah help all others who are having hard time....

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