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My mother wants marriage

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Guest - Confused -

Asalamou Alaicom

 

how are you all, May Allah reward you for all the advices you are giving to other brothers and sisters. We all sure face problems, but i wonder if you could help me out with this one:

 

i'm the only one left in my family. My mother wants marriage, which is Islamicly better for a women. Where as my father have always wanted his children to be educated at higher degrees which is also good for the Muslim society and future.

 

At the end, it's my choice Insha Allah, but the thing is, i'm confused!!! they both have their advantages and disadvantages.

 

when i look at the bright side of marriage i see "meeting the pleasure of Allah and living the sunnah of the prophet" but also when i look at the bright side of further more educated (in regards to Islamic fields of course) i see "Having knowledge and being able to speak up, helping others mainly the "Youth", and doing good to both my self (good deeds) as well as the Muslims around me.

 

i look at marriage before education again, but i see that in our society today it's all different, we need somebody to speak up and make unity, make more Muslim communities, have something that will back them up when they come to a stage where there is no worldy back up (for example, husband ill and gotta take care and have responsibility towards the family).

 

but again marriage and family building is half of a person's practise of religion.

also education will get in the way of marriage life making a person neglet their duties towards their husband and children.

 

i'm really confused even though i still have about 4 years to make a decision.

 

how can you advise me on such an issue by again reffering to whom to please,

 

my mother that carried me nine months or so in her tummy and tried her best to advice me and make me a young mature Muslim girl. A person who the prophet (pbuh) said: Your mother, your mother, your mother and then your father???

 

or my father, who although used to work and provide us with our needs but also stay up to help us out with school work and give us Islamic advice of how to be come great Muslims???

 

i guess that's a tough one to resolve, not if you help me out :D

 

Jazakom Allahu Khair :D

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PropellerAds

Salaam,

 

How about marrying someone who'd be happy for you to carry on studying?

 

Wassalaam.

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:D

 

Find a practising husband who will let you continue your studies, and delay children until you finish. The husband will have to understand that allowing you to study means he has to help around the house (housework shared equally). If he is not fair, then it will be harder to study, cook and clean and look after a child (hence better to delay children until after your studies, some people can manage studies with a child, but they need support from husband and/or family.)

 

Do guys like that exist? Yes they do .... *sigh* That way you please both your mother and father. You never know how hard it may be finding someone, so I suggest you start your parents looking for that guy ASAP.

 

:D it will be easy for you.

 

:P

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assalamu alaikum wr wb

 

Sister it seems that masha Allah you already have a very good and logical way of looking at things. I dont think Im in any position to give you advice that you should listen to, but I will respond according to how I feel and think and you can make up your mind whether or not what I say is of any use to you insha Allah.

 

Firstly as you pointed out marriage is very important but so is the seeking of knowledge, my advice would be to why cant u have both? Maybe insha Allah pray istikhara for some direction. Its one thing to say you want an education and to go out and get one fairly easily but usually to say yes I want to be married takes a little longer to happen, finding the right person etc doesnt always happen right away. Maybe you can go ahead with your education if you want and then still have the niyat to get married and Insha Allah when the time is right it will come. I dont know all that much about you situation or if what I have said has made any sense or maybe confused you more(I hope not), but just make du'a for guidance insha Allah your decisions will come easily.

 

wasalams

your sister in Islam

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:D

 

Yes that as mentioend by Leila, continue your studies while loking for someone as it may take a while, may not. Some people 4+ years, so you see good idea to get a degree meanwhile.

 

:D

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assalamu alaikom

dear sis..well ialmost have the same problem and when i thought about it again and again i realized that the best thing to do concentrate on ur studies now and dont look for the marriage urself let it come to u..and if it happened and came dont accept it unless it satisfies both sides of ur family,,and at the end remember that ur daddy would indeed like to see u a bride and a successful person in her entire community and society

 

God bleessss uu alwaays :D

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assalaamu alaykum,

 

why not do both?

 

i know student brothers who are married (some who were married whilst still at school).

 

they tend to stop with one spouses family during the week and the others during the weekend,

 

or if at uni they live apart but then visit each other and can sleep overnight and keep each other away from fitnah but only move in after university but spend all their holidays and weekends together.

 

we have the contraceptive pill these days, it is possible for you to marry and go to uni if you wish.

 

when i marry again (soon insha'Allah), i personally want a family soon but would put it off for 3 years if a good sister came along, so it is possible for you to marry a slightly older brother who can support you,

 

or many other brothers are willing to wait and would be happy to have the more fun bits of marriage whilst you were at uni and then begin a family afterwards as they are students also.

 

but of-course Allah is the best of planners and accidents do happen so keep that in mind also, that you could end up having to leave university or take a year or two out if you have a child.

 

i know of 1 brother at a UK university who will be studying for 3-4 more years but is looking for a wife who is a student and so willing to marry to help keep each other from fitnah but she is willing to put off a family until after they finish their studies.

 

i personally would not want any of my future (insha'Allah many) sons or daughters going to uni unless they were married to help protect them from the fitnah found at uni where even some formally religious muslims get dragged into the debaurchory that is modern student life - this lifestyle seems to be partially encouraged by the authorities who support student bars and many student societies who seek to drag down basic morality.

Edited by dawud_uk

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:D

 

What do you want? What have you done to expilain that to them and what was their response? Education--how much and how do you plan to benefit yourself from it in terms of BOTH DEEN and dunya?

 

Listen to this lecture:

"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_www.troid(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/audio/sisters/themuslimwoman/marriageoreducation.htm"]Marriage or Education, Which Comes First?[/url]

Edited by ummammaar

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:D

rasullah (SAW) has said in a hadith that we should seek both deeny and worldy knowledge. however where as men can travel and learn , we female need a mahrem with us. also in another hadith Rasulullah (SAW) has said that the father should get his daughter married at the age of 12 and later if they get mixed in wrong doings then the sin falls upon the parents. i dont know if you live in england or not but if you do then you probably know that its a law that we cant get married before the age of 16. so this is out of the question. this hadith is not word to word but it is in mishkat (part 2).also you should look at your deen before your dunya (worldy knowlegde).

i pray to Allah (SWT) that he helps you do whats right. :P

:D

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salaam wa alaikum sisters and brothers.

some very good points riased mashallah that hasve made me think as well as many others i think

 

you could, sister, do both. study and maintain a healthy and Islamic relationship.

i also think you should do salaatul istikahrah if you want guidance from the all knower- Allah swt.

 

i think also you should evaluate yourself.

what i mean by that is that you should ask yourself, where am i in life? what good deeds have i done, like give to the poor and etc?

what good shall i continue doing? what am i doing FOR THE SAKE OF Allah SWT?

 

thats an important point.

however sister, do update us here on your decison because i am interested in what decision you will take.,

one final thing, may Allah swt guide us all to the right path. ameen summa ameen.

i hoped my advice has helped you sister.

 

also this part is to muslimah4eva: yes i do live in the Uk and the law states you cannot marry unless you are 16 with your parents consent. and you can marry without your parents consent at the age of 18.

so sister, where does this put the hadith? in reagrds to marrying at the age of 12?

 

grateful for the replies.

jazakallh

wa a alaikum salaam

wa alaikum salaam

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also this part is to muslimah4eva: yes i do live in the Uk and the law states you cannot marry unless you are 16 with your parents consent. and you can marry without your parents consent at the age of 18.

so sister, where does this put the hadith? in reagrds to marrying at the age of 12?

 

grateful for the replies.

jazakallh

wa a alaikum salaam

wa alaikum salaam

 

:D

hey sis thats what am trying to say, because this the law of this country is that you cant marry before 16 then you have to abide by the law! however there is nothing wrong at getting somone engaged at that age

:D

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salaam wa alaikum

ok jazakallh for clearing that up and providing the hadeeth.

 

wa alaikum salaam

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Guest - Confused -

Asalamou Alaicom wr wb..

 

apologies brothers and sisters i delayed my replies, but here are they to every single post posted:

 

Brother Borbus:

Salaam,

 

How about marrying someone who'd be happy for you to carry on studying?

 

Wassalaam.

 

hmm... that's a good idea, but the thing is, the majority of pious men are more convinient for their wives to to be a "House Wife"... pretty rare to find muslim men who will encourage you to continue your studies, them being affraid that the wife might neglect her duties towards her husband.

 

But of course it's all about undersdanding!

 

after all.. Allahu A'lam

 

---------------------------------------

 

Brother ahm

:D

 

Find a practising husband who will let you continue your studies, and delay children until you finish. The husband will have to understand that allowing you to study means he has to help around the house (housework shared equally). If he is not fair, then it will be harder to study, cook and clean and look after a child (hence better to delay children until after your studies, some people can manage studies with a child, but they need support from husband and/or family.)

 

Do guys like that exist? Yes they do .... *sigh* That way you please both your mother and father. You never know how hard it may be finding someone, so I suggest you start your parents looking for that guy ASAP.

 

:D it will be easy for you.

 

Jazak Allahu Khair...

 

yeah, i undersand how it's a shared thing. Besides, he would be my husband, a person who should stick by my side, as well as i of course. But as you said it's not as easy to find a person who is ready to come back tiered from work and help me out with my own!

 

so from the post above, i obtained that this particular person should to be "understanding" or mainly i have to be the one to expain deedly my wanted careers, and from this one ^ ^ ^ "Caring" or in another words a person who would be patient.

 

----------------------------------------

 

Sister Leila

my advice would be to why cant u have both? Maybe insha Allah pray istikhara for some direction. Its one thing to say you want an education and to go out and get one fairly easily but usually to say yes I want to be married takes a little longer to happen, finding the right person etc doesnt always happen right away. Maybe you can go ahead with your education if you want and then still have the niyat to get married and Insha Allah when the time is right it will come. I dont know all that much about you situation or if what I have said has made any sense or maybe confused you more(I hope not), but just make du'a for guidance insha Allah your decisions will come easily.

 

wasalams

your sister in Islam

 

nooo sister, you havn't confused me at all, Masha Allah, your advice is really to be thought of Insha Allah, and as you said Istikhara will always help me out to seek the right direction.

 

after all, marriage is half of my deen.. so the niya (intention) should always be there and never delayed insha Allah.

 

-------------------------------------------

 

Brother ahm

:P

 

Yes that as mentioend by Leila, continue your studies while loking for someone as it may take a while, may not. Some people 4+ years, so you see good idea to get a degree meanwhile.

 

:D

 

yep, it sure is... but you see, i want to do something in regards to religion, or study something that leads to good deeds. And i think wanting such educational careers might make my future husdand Insha Allah more undersading and encouraging.

 

-----------------------------------------

 

sister freee2flyyy

assalamu alaikom

dear sis..well ialmost have the same problem and when i thought about it again and again i realized that the best thing to do concentrate on ur studies now and dont look for the marriage urself let it come to u..and if it happened and came dont accept it unless it satisfies both sides of ur family,,and at the end remember that ur daddy would indeed like to see u a bride and a successful person in her entire community and society

 

God bleessss uu alwaays :P

 

from what i understand ukhti us "Reality" just go on through education, as the same time block marriage unless it satisfies what i'm seeking for.

 

being a brode and a sucessful person in the Islamic community and society?

i think that would be a tramendous result. And it's what i should be aiming for!

 

-----------------------------------------

 

Brother Dawud_uk:

assalaamu alaykum,

 

why not do both?

 

i know student brothers who are married (some who were married whilst still at school).

 

they tend to stop with one spouses family during the week and the others during the weekend,

 

or if at uni they live apart but then visit each other and can sleep overnight and keep each other away from fitnah but only move in after university but spend all their holidays and weekends together

 

That may satisfy me.. but i'm pretty sure it won't be right in my parent's prespective!!!

 

we have the contraceptive pill these days, it is possible for you to marry and go to uni if you wish.

 

when i marry again (soon insha'Allah), i personally want a family soon but would put it off for 3 years if a good sister came along, so it is possible for you to marry a slightly older brother who can support you,

 

That's for sure bi'ithniLah

 

or many other brothers are willing to wait and would be happy to have the more fun bits of marriage whilst you were at uni and then begin a family afterwards as they are students also.

 

hmm.. well perhaps you're right, besides you're a brother. So you might have new a number of brothers who started the "Marriage Journey" in that particular way ^^^

 

but of-course Allah is the best of planners and accidents do happen so keep that in mind also, that you could end up having to leave university or take a year or two out if you have a child.

 

That's very true Sobhana Lah, a human plans and plans, and at the end a total different plan would be waiting for him! But no matter what happens, i will always remember the verse in surat al-baqarah:

 

'assa an takrahou shay'an wahuwa khayron lakom, wa'assa an tuhibu shay'an wahuwa sharon lakom, waLahu ya'lamou wa antom la ta'lamoun. (If any of the brothers and sisters have the translation for it please post it Insha Allah)

 

i know of 1 brother at a UK university who will be studying for 3-4 more years but is looking for a wife who is a student and so willing to marry to help keep each other from fitnah but she is willing to put off a family until after they finish their studies.

 

i personally would not want any of my future (insha'Allah many) sons or daughters going to uni unless they were married to help protect them from the fitnah found at uni where even some formally religious muslims get dragged into the debaurchory that is modern student life - this lifestyle seems to be partially encouraged by the authorities who support student bars and many student societies who seek to drag down basic morality.

 

You see, that's a realy big disadvantage that slightly backs me off sometimes! It's pretty hard to cope with such environments in the west esspecially as a young single woman. And plus, uni life might arose a comflict between the 2 partners. After all, i know of a number of sisters who passed this stage and Al-hamdulilah they were not draged along the fitnah. But it depends on a person's will and the control of worldy desires.

 

We ask Allah to protect us from the fitna of this world. Ameen.

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Guest - Confused -

(Part 2 of reply)

 

---------------------------------------------

 

Sister ummammaar

:D

 

What do you want? What have you done to expilain that to them and what was their response? Education--how much and how do you plan to benefit yourself from it in terms of BOTH DEEN and dunya?

 

Listen to this lecture:

Marriage or Education, Which Comes First?

 

---------------------------------------------

 

 

To be honest ukhti, i said i'll seek advice from my beloved sisters and respected brothers at IF before i refer to them. However, the right time to talk about this issue has not yet come, but it shall soon Insha Allah.

 

first i need to determine what i want as an educational career. I also have to explain to them that i don't mind marriage, as long as the chosen husband agrees with what i'll insha Allah be doing in regards to education. You see, the reason i want "Isalamic education" or anything that may in future relate to deen, is so i can educate (mainly) my children all the way through about the most important asect in their life and that is "Islam", so they can grow up not just knowing the basics of Islam, but also further more, and deep into it. Not only that, but through knowledge and Islamic Education i would be following "One of the purposes for a woman to work in Islam" and that is "If the society is in need of her".

 

I really hope my parents will undersand what i've always wanted, but it might be a bit of a since all my siblings got marrid after HSC and got kids!

 

by the way ukhti, jazaki Lahu khair for the lecture.. i didn't get at chance to listen to all of it yep, but insha Allah i will soon.

 

--------------------------------

 

 

 

Sister Muslimah4eva

:P

rasullah (SAW) has said in a hadith that we should seek both deeny and worldy knowledge. however where as men can travel and learn , we female need a mahrem with us. also in another hadith Rasulullah (SAW) has said that the father should get his daughter married at the age of 12 and later if they get mixed in wrong doings then the sin falls upon the parents. i dont know if you live in england or not but if you do then you probably know that its a law that we cant get married before the age of 16. so this is out of the question. this hadith is not word to word but it is in mishkat (part 2).also you should look at your deen before your dunya (worldy knowlegde). i pray to Allah (SWT) that he helps you do whats right. :P

:D

 

Sadaqa RasuluLah

 

 

not quite in England sister, but in Australia. Here it is upto the age of 18. But this law doesn't affect the sunnah of Rasululah which is Al-katb-ul-kitab which is mainly marriage.

 

in regards to the bolded hadith:

true, but when that knowlege links to the deen, it would be a totally different stroy, or am i wrong ?

 

Ameen for the dua

Edited by slave

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Guest - Confused -

(Part 3 of reply)

 

-----------------------------------

 

asian gyal 4 lyf:

salaam wa alaikum sisters and brothers.

some very good points riased mashallah that hasve made me think as well as many others i think

 

very true indeed, May Allah swt reward all of you and help you out just like the way you're helping me and other brothers and sisters too.. :D

you could, sister, do both. study and maintain a healthy and Islamic relationship. i also think you should do salaatul istikahrah if you want guidance from the all knower- Allah swt.

 

:P ... May Allah bless us with His guidance. Ameen.

 

i think also you should evaluate yourself.

what i mean by that is that you should ask yourself, where am i in life? what good deeds have i done, like give to the poor and etc?

what good shall i continue doing? what am i doing FOR THE SAKE OF Allah SWT?

thats an important point.

 

This is all stored in my head ukhti, i just ask Allah to be with me..

 

the first step is not easy at all:no:

 

however sister, do update us here on your decison because i am interested in what decision you will take.,

one final thing, may Allah swt guide us all to the right path. ameen summa ameen.

i hoped my advice has helped you sister.

 

i will continues posting in this thread untill it's all finalised bi'ithnilLah. Yes your advice did help al-hamdulilah, as well as everybody elses. and Ameen for the dua :D

 

also this part is to muslimah4eva: yes i do live in the Uk and the law states you cannot marry unless you are 16 with your parents consent. and you can marry without your parents consent at the age of 18.

so sister, where does this put the hadith? in reagrds to marrying at the age of 12?

ike how i replied to the sister. This does not affect the the marriage of Muslims, when 2 of my sisters married before the age of 18, they did normal Kateb-kitab. However, as soon as they turned 18, they informed it in public and stated it so they could get their marriage certificate.

 

 

-------------------------------------

 

Al hamdulilah.. i've replied to every post Insha Allah...

 

you all gave me clear understanding Masha Allah!!! before i put that post in i was a bit shaky. But know, alhamdulilah, i find my self more comfortable and less scared of the "Real Life".

 

as to conclude the majority of opinions, i can say that there wouldn't be anything wrong with continuing educational careers as well as suitable marriage. However, i need to do a lot of explanation, first for the parents and second for the groom.. lol

 

anyhow, i really appreciate every minute you spent on this thread and i ask Allah to reward you all for it. I really hope this thread will continually receive the advice

 

Jazakom Allahu Khair

 

Wasalamou Alaicom wr wb

 

Edited by slave

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note: i am not the author of the 2 post or the thread even though it says edited by slave

Edited by slave

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salaam wa alaikum sister

thank you for updating us. jazakallah.

well alot of advice has been gievn and it is up to you to take it accordingly and what you think is best by Allah swt.

 

mashallah you have acknowledged the fact that you have to talk to your parents and the husband. not many people in this situation would think of these.

 

and may Allah swt give evrey brother and sister in the ummat e muslimeen (mulsim community)sabr. (patience) AMEEN.

 

sister you may now know what to do and it is good to know that you are feeling confident by the mintue. alhmadulillah :D

 

wa alaikum salam

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Guest Guest

Jazaki Lahu Khair for such encouragment ukhti ^ ^ ^ May Allah bless you all. :D

 

May Allah swt lighten our way. Allahuma ameen.

 

I feel a bit shaky about dicussing this with my parents because they are going to be :P because i hardly express what i want inside in regards to future, i simply plan and rely on Allah.... it might not be as easy taking the first step, i neither might not get my way from the first time. But i wont lose hope Insha Allah, i sincerely need you duas though. A dua from a brother/sister to a brother/sister in Islam, is just so great in the sight of Allah!!

 

May Allah reward you all. And insha Allah, as soon as i open the convo with my parents about this issue, i'll strait away refer you the updates bi'ithniLah. I just want things to settled a little after my sister's wedding party B)

 

Jazakom Allahu Khair :D

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salaam wa alaikum

it may be scary and nerve rakcing discussing things but trust me sis, its for the best. just tell youself it will be over soon.

 

we await for the updates.

in the meantime take care

wa alaikum salaam

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(Part 2 of reply)

 

---------------------------------------------

 

Sister ummammaar

---------------------------------------------

To be honest ukhti, i said i'll seek advice from my beloved sisters and respected brothers at IF before i refer to them. However, the right time to talk about this issue has not yet come, but it shall soon Insha Allah.

 

first i need to determine what i want as an educational career. I also have to explain to them that i don't mind marriage, as long as the chosen husband agrees with what i'll insha Allah be doing in regards to education. You see, the reason i want "Isalamic education" or anything that may in future relate to deen, is so i can educate (mainly) my children all the way through about the most important asect in their life and that is "Islam", so they can grow up not just knowing the basics of Islam, but also further more, and deep into it. Not only that, but through knowledge and Islamic Education i would be following "One of the purposes for a woman to work in Islam" and that is "If the society is in need of her".

 

I really hope my parents will undersand what i've always wanted, but it might be a bit of a since all my siblings got marrid after HSC and got kids!

 

by the way ukhti, jazaki Lahu khair for the lecture.. i didn't get at chance to listen to all of it yep, but insha Allah i will soon.

 

--------------------------------

Sister Muslimah4eva

Sadaqa RasuluLah

not quite in England sister, but in Australia. Here it is upto the age of 18. But this law doesn't affect the sunnah of Rasululah which is Al-katb-ul-kitab which is mainly marriage.

 

in regards to the bolded hadith:

true, but when that knowlege links to the deen, it would be a totally different stroy, or am i wrong ?

 

Ameen for the dua

 

:D

okay am a bit lost here bacause i aint been in here for such along time!

anyway! i seem to think that in everything we do the dunyawee knowledge is somehow llinked to it! for example: am learning the tafseer of the quraan, now the quraan has a lot of history, science and geography! zakaat in which we have to work out how much we need to give has maths in it! so in many ways it is llinkedbut i still think that the sister should fulfil the sunnah and get married!

:D

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asalam alaikum

 

i want to advise you on the basis of action, so whatever i advise it would help you if you did it straightaway to clear doubt.

 

Get a pen and 2 pieces of paper, and on the first paper i want you to write "marrige" then make 2 columns, pro's and con's, now when you write them it would help if you wrote how you felt about them as well.

 

Then do the same but this time write marrige and the pro's and the con's then you have to look at both sheets and sit yourself down and really think hard, hopefully the technique should help you inshallah.

 

Now before we go anywhere near your parents, you need to know where you stand then we can progress to whichever parent will help you in your desicion.

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Guest Guest
:D

okay am a bit lost here bacause i aint been in here for such along time!

anyway! i seem to think that in everything we do the dunyawee knowledge is somehow llinked to it! for example: am learning the tafseer of the quraan, now the quraan has a lot of history, science and geography! zakaat in which we have to work out how much we need to give has maths in it! so in many ways it is llinked

:P

 

that's what's making me wanting to continue my education, sobhana Lah Allah has not made anything pure evil. It all depends on how a person uses his or her knowledge and apply it on other people!

 

but i still think that the sister should fulfil the sunnah and get married!

 

Of course ukhti, that's something i'll do for sure Isha Allah. But just like what the majority said, continue with both! But if it came to a stage where it's either education or marriage, ill go for marriage. Besides, i can always learn on my own!

 

Jazaki Lahu Khair :D

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Guest Guest
asalam alaikum

 

i want to advise you on the basis of action, so whatever i advise it would help you if you did it straightaway to clear doubt.

 

Get a pen and 2 pieces of paper, and on the first paper i want you to write "marrige" then make 2 columns, pro's and con's, now when you write them it would help if you wrote how you felt about them as well.

 

Then do the same but this time write marrige and the pro's and the con's then you have to look at both sheets and sit yourself down and really think hard, hopefully the technique should help you inshallah.

 

okay, this sounds interesting. I wrote what you said, but not yet my thoughts because i just wanted to ask: What's pro's and cons? :P :D

 

 

Now before we go anywhere near your parents, you need to know where you stand then we can progress to whichever parent will help you in your desicion.

 

hmm... from what i understood is that, in which am i more eligibal to do first, education or marriage.

 

from what i can see... i'm able to, that's only if Allah wills and gives my the will to continue and be a high achiever, but as i said, i want to either do something that i can link to Islam, such as interperting and from that, translate Islamic books into different languages OR study the Islam furthermore to make a "sister's community" here in australia or to use what i learn on my own family. <--- that's how i'll be achieving both.

 

But it's only if the persopn who i'll be looking fwd in marrying accepts such decissions :D that's what i'm afraid of!

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that's what's making me wanting to continue my education, sobhana Lah Allah has not made anything pure evil. It all depends on how a person uses his or her knowledge and apply it on other people!

 

Jazaki Lahu Khair :D

 

:D

 

cant you get married and study at the same time? i mean like get married and study from home to make both parents happy?

 

:D

Edited by Muslimah4eva

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okay, this sounds interesting. I wrote what you said, but not yet my thoughts because i just wanted to ask: What's pro's and cons? :D  :D

 

 

asalam alaikum

 

pro's and con's simply means, the positive aspects, and the negative aspects.

 

sorry if i explained it too hard, and also sorry for taking so long

 

wasalam.

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