By happy spirit
Michael: “Being brief and concise, the topic is that I believe that marriage should be monogamous for both sides. In other words, I believe that the polygamy, that Islam allows, is a kind of oppression meted out towards the woman, don't you agree with me?!”
Yousef: “Which woman do you mean?”
Michael (in surprise): “The woman! The wife! Is there any other woman in this relationship?!”
Yousef: “As we previously agreed, to rightly discuss a topic it should be within a general framework in which all matters are arranged and all dimensions are considered.”
Michael: “Well, How can this affect our topic?”
Yousef: “It can affect it as when we discuss the polygamy, we should consider the woman’s interests, as the female sex; i.e. all women, and consider the society’s interests as a whole, and man’s interests, as well, and the differences between him and the woman.”
Michael (interrupting): “Here we come to the origin of the oppression that is meted out towards the woman in your community: the differences between the man and the woman! These so called differences are values set by the males in your eastern community, in order to exploit women and use her for your own enjoyment. What are these differences (that you referred to)? Why doesn't the woman have the right to marry more than one man? Isn't that evidence of the men's lust in this community?
Yousef: Wait... Wait… slow down, my friend.. You have thrown a fission bomb of questions at me which is prohibited in any conversation, and all of which I can't deal with at one time.. All of these will be discussed, but let's first break this bomb into pieces. Starting with what provokes you most: Don't you agree with me that there are differences between men and women?
Michael: What differences?
Yousef: For a start; the biological differences between the physical nature of women and men.
Michael: Of course there are biological differences, what does this have to do with our topic?
Yousef: I won't speak from a religious prospective, though I definitely believe in the necessity of accepting and admitting it (such a view), but I will speak from an intellectual and scientific prospective, which you have previously declared that you believe in. Look sir,
l recently conducted scientific studies that prove that the chemistry behind love in man differs from that in woman. This urged many scientific institutions to intensively research the emotional differences between men and women. Researchers discovered astonishing results which denotes that the male genes induce polygamous relationships, whereas the female genes induce stability and monogamous relationships. Modern-day science has already proved that man can love more than one woman, without affecting his love for any of them.
A CNN site cited on the authority of Lisa Diamond, a Professor of Psychology at the University of Utah, that there is biological evidence that plurality in sexual male relationships originates from the male physical structure.
A team of researchers from the British Oxford University denoted in a study in 2007 that women, on the contrary to men, are mainly interested in their bodies or their children, because of their abundance of the hormone oxytocin, which increases their attachment to their children.
New studies indicate that particular parts of men's brains grow to twice the size of that of women’s. Perhaps the greatest difference between the male and female brain is that men have a part which is responsible for sexual desire which is almost 2.5 times larger than that in women. Furthermore,
do you think, my friend, that these differences should not have an influence on reality?
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From the very beginning, historians and writers of Seerah have differed on the date of birth of Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم. There are disagreements even for the ‘year’ of birth of Prophet Muhammadصلى الله عليه وسلم so, naturally we have different views regarding his ‘month’ of birth and ‘date’ of birth. Considering the fact that a wide majority of the historians have mentioned the ‘month’ to be Rabi ul awwal, one can safely assume that the month was Rabi ul awwal. Furthermore, it is proven from Authentic Narrations that his ‘day’ of birth was ‘Monday’.
Abu Qatada Ansari رضى الله عنه reported that Allah's Messenger صلى االه عليه وسلمwas asked about fasting on Monday, whereupon he said: It is (the day) when I was born and revelation was sent down to me.
(Sahih Al Bukhari – Kitab As Sawm)
The different views regarding the date of birth are:
2nd Rabi ul Awwal: Ibn Abd al-Barr
5th Rabi ul Awwal: Ameer ud din
8th Rabi ul Awwal: Ibn al Qayyim, ibn e Hazm, Az Zuhri , Ibn e Dihya
9th Rabi ul Awwal : Muhammad Suleman Mansurpuri, Mubarakpuri , Shibli Nomani, Mahmud Pasha Falaki, Akbar Shah Najeeb Abadi, Moeen ud din Ahmed Nadvi, Abul Kalam Azad
12th Rabi ul Awwal: Tabari, ibn e Khuldoon , Dr hameedullah , ibn e hisham, ‘Allama Abu’l-Hasan ‘Ali ibn Muhammad al- Mawardi, ibn e ishaaq
10th Rabi ul Awwal: Abul Fida, Abu Jaafar al Baaqir, Al Waqadi , Al Sha’bi– 10
17th Rabi ul Awwal: Shia view; and they also believe that it was Friday
22nd Rabi ul Awwal: Also attributed to ibn e Hazm
10th Muharram: Abdul Qadir Jilani
Now, how can one find the true date out of the numerous opinions? The only sure-shot information that we have is that it was the Monday and the month Rabi ul Awwal. Few biographers of the Seerah have mentioned that a person named Mahmud Pasha Falki proved through astronomical calculations that the Monday falls on 9th Rabi ul Awwal in the year when Rasulullah was born. People who have written biographies in the past century have accepted his research and they normally quote the date of birth to be 9th Rabi ul Awwal. Furthermore, Allama Qastalani writes that the people of Zaych are in agreement that the eighth of Rabi ul Awwal was the Monday.
The presence of such disagreements on the exact day of his birth proves that birthdays were not important to the Arabs. Arabs were very well known for their great memorization skills. They used know the lineage of their families and other Arabs by heart; they used to know hundreds of verses of poetry by heart, a great feat of memorization. Documentation wasn’t very common. Hence, it is very difficult to conclude when exactly Rasulullah was born.
Why we cannot find the Exact Date Even from Astronomical Calculations
The pagan Arabs would play with the calendar and amend it according to their wishes; which is referred to as Nasi. The pagan Arabs practiced Nasi in two ways.
1- Whenever it suited them, they would declare a prohibited month to be an ordinary month in which fighting, robbery and murder in retaliation were lawful for them. Then they would declare an ordinary month to be a prohibited month instead of this month in order to make up for the deficiency caused in the number of the prohibited months. Earlier writers of Seerah like Ibn e Hisham and commentators like Mujahid quoted that one year the Arab made Muharram as Halal, and they would consider Safar to be sacred (Haram), and the next year they’ll take Muharram to be sacred. They did so because three sacred months Dhul-Hijj, Dhul-Q’ada and Muharram were consecutive. `Abd al-Raĥmān ibn Zayd ibn Aslam, another leading commentator says that they would make two Safar one year and two Muharram next year.
2- The other way of Nasi was the addition of a month in order to harmonize the lunar year to the solar year so that the Hajj of Prophet Muhammad should always fall in the same season and they should be saved from the botheration and inconveniences that are experienced by its observance according to the lunar year. Due to the lunar calendar, the months shifted 11 days earlier each successive year, thus the people wished to perform the hajj (pilgrimage) ceremony - which coincided with different seasons - not on certain days of Dhu al-Hijjah, but on other days and months when the weather was mild and trade environment was suitable. In order to ensure this, they used the nasi (adjustment) method. So, the way out was to add a month after every three years. In this way Haj was observed for 36 years on dates other than the actual dates. Then in the thirty seventh year it was again observed on the 9th and 10th of Zil-Hajjah, as they should have actually fallen according to the lunar calendar. It so happened that on the occasion when the Holy Prophet performed Hujjatul-Wida' (Farewell Haj). These dates by rotation coincided with the actual dates of Haj according to the lunar calendar
Abu Bakra reported that (in the Farewell Address) Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) said: Time has completed a cycle and come to the state of the day when Allah created the heavens and the earth. The year is constituted of twelve months, of which four are sacred; three of them consecutive, viz. Dhu'l-Qa'da, Dhu'l- Hijja and Muharram, and also Rajab the month of Mudar which comes between Jumada and Sha'ban.
(Sahih Muslim - Al-Kitab Al-Qasama wa'l-Muharaba wa'l-Qisas wa'l-Diyat)
Qur’an also mentions this act of delaying months in Surah At Tawbah.
Nasi (Postponing of the sacred month) is only an addition in unbelief, wherewith those who disbelieve are led astray, violating it one year and keeping it sacred another, that they may agree in the number (of months) that Allah has made sacred, and thus violate what Allah has made sacred; the evil of their doings is made fair-seeming to them; and Allah does not guide the unbelieving people.
(Surah At Tawbah 9:37)
Moreover, before the annunciation of prophet-hood, there was not any official calendar in force in the Arab land. The Arabs were accustomed to changing and altering the months as they pleased, and hence, sometimes they would make thirteen and fourteen months in one year. It is mentioned in Diya’ al-Qur’an that in a lunar year one extra intercalary month would be added to the existing twelve months. It is quite clear that before the annunciation of prophethood, such additions were made, however, we can never know in which specific year or years additions were made. (Diya’ al-Ummat, Justice Shaykh Muhammad Karam Shah al- Azhari (ra), Diya’ al-Qur’an, volume 1, page 202, note 60.)
Considering the above mentioned facts, we can never be sure about the date of birth of Prophet Muhammad. The exact birthdate of the Prophet Muhammad has always been the subject of dispute amongst classical scholars. Nothing authentic has been reported in the standard source books of tradition, and this fact in itself shows that it was not held in the significance that later authorities did. The astronomical researches are invalid considering the practice of Nasi. The only way we could have been absolutely sure about it was if Prophet Muhammad would have told us that himself, which he actually didn’t. If we consider this fact we would be forced to leave all bid’aat (innovations) attached with 12th of Rabi ul Awwal.
Why 12th Rabiulawwal is famous?
1- The two famous books authors of Seerah Ibn e Hisham and Ibn e Ishaaq both have mentioned it to be 12thRabi ul Awwal.
2- Perhaps those who decided to start milad took this day: This also explains why Ibn ʿAbd al-Barr, writing before the conception of the mawlid in the fifth century of the hijrah, stated that the most common opinion amongst historians was in fact the 8th of Rabīʿ al-Awwal, and yet Ibn Kathīr, writing three centuries later, after the mawlid had been introduced as a public festival, stated that the 12th of Rabīʿ al-Awwal was the most common opinion. Earlier historians like Ibn e S’ad didn’t even put 12 Rabi ul Awwal in the list of candidates for Birthday of Prophet Muhammad. In the earlier days 8th Rabi ul Awwal used to be accepted as the date of Birth.
Date of Death
What we know for sure is that day of his death was ‘Monday’, as for the date we have different narrations. The famous one is 12th rabiulawwal.
Narrated Hisham's father: Aisha said, "I went to Abu Bakr (during his fatal illness) and he asked me, 'In how many garments was the Prophet shrouded?' She replied, 'In three Sahuliya pieces of white cloth of cotton, and there was neither a shirt nor a turban among them.' Abu Bakr further asked her, 'On which day did the Prophet die?' She replied, 'He died on Monday.' He asked, 'What is today?' She replied, 'Today is Monday.' He added, 'I hope I shall die sometime between this morning and tonight.' Then he looked at a garment that he was wearing during his illness and it had some stains of saffron. Then he said, 'Wash this garment of mine and add two more garments and shroud me in them.' I said, 'This is worn out.' He said, 'A living person has more right to wear new clothes than a dead one; the shroud is only for the body's pus.' He did not die till it was the night of Tuesday and was buried before the morning."
(Bukhari – Kitab al Janaiz)
13th Rabi ul Awwal: Muhammad Suleman Mansurpure
12th Rabi ul Awwal: Mubarakpuri
2nd Rabi ul Awwal: Ibn e Hajr
1st Rabi ul Awwal: Ibn e Jareer
28th Safar: Sh’ia Historians (They also mention the day to be Monday)
From the books of Hadith we can be sure that the year Prophet Muhammad died:
9th Dhil Hijjah was Friday (Bukhari – Prophetic Commentary on the Qur’an)
“….It was Friday and the Prophet was standing at 'Arafat (i.e. the Day of Hajj)"
(Narrated by Umar bin Al-Khattab)
We have four possibilities:
1- If Dhil Hijjah, Muharram and Safar all were of 30 days, Rabi ul Awwal starts on Wednesday and Mondays fall on 6th, 13th and so on.
2- If Dhil Hijjah, Muharram and Safar all were of 29 days, Rabi ul Awwal starts on Sunday and Mondays fall on 2nd, 9th, 16th and so on.
3- If any two months were of 29 days and one of 30 days, Rabi ul Awwal starts on Monday and Mondays fall on 1st, 8th, 15th and so on.
4- If any two months were of 30 days and one of 29 days, Rabi ul Awwal starts on Monday and Mondays fall on 7th, 14th and so on.
As for 28th Safar:
1- If Dhil Hijjah and Muharram are 30 days it is Sunday.
2- If Dhil HIjjah and Muharram are 29 days it is Friday
3- If one is 29 and the other is 30 it is Saturday.
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By Absolute truth
It is generally believed that Western society is monogamous. It is true that monogamy has been enforced by an act of Parliament but it needs to be seen to what extent it is being observed.
There is, in fact, nothing like the practice of true monogamy in the West when we consider the miserable plight of the numerous mistresses who are deprived of womanhood and respect. One Orientalist has stated that irresponsible polygamy is practiced in the West which Islam does not permit.
A close look at Western society shows that its moral and spiritual condition is comparable to that of Arabian society at the time of the advent of the Holy Prophet of Islam. In fact this state of moral degeneracy has spread almost to the four corners of the world. The root cause is the imbalance between the two sexes caused by a depletion of males during the two world wars. This view is supported by statistics published in the Western press. Some persons have expressed their view that polygamy is the only solution for the increased problem of prostitution.
Dr. Le Bon, a French sexologist, has written:
“A return to polygamy, the natural relationship between the sexes, would remedy many evils: prostitution, venereal diseases, abortion, the misery of illegitimate children, the misfortune of millions of unwanted women, resulting from the disproportion between the sexes, adultery and even jealousy.”
As a matter of fact the West has nothing to lose by adopting the Islamic concept of limited polygamy as it has already done in the case of divorce.
The West has advanced in the direction towards its own emancipation by granting divorce. At the same time it has not fully realized and appreciated the Islamic teachings on divorce which has in a nutshell been beautifully described by the Prophet of Islam: “Of all lawful things, the most hateful in the sight of Allah is divorce.”
While divorce is allowed it is not encouraged unless circumstances fully warrant it. By discarding old dogmatic beliefs Western minds are, on the basis of rational thinking, moving gradually towards the principles of Islam. All praise belongs to Allah, Lord of all the worlds.
The western law does not recognize a second wife as a legal wife where as Islam does. If the western law can accommodate common law arrangements between long term partners and same sex marriages then why can it not also accommodate a second wife of a Muslim male as his legal wife? How does making this provision for Muslims affect disbelievers in any way?