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ZakariaCilmi

Need Help Regarding My Wife

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Brothers and Sisters, I really need help regarding my wife. 

We have been in good terms since 29/09/2014, we never argued with each other and we were in good terms with each other. But for some reason things have changed between us after January this year. She began to disobey my orders, talk back at me when I tell her something, even sometimes abuse me by words and sometimes use violence (Push me away or slap me) If we are arguiing. Things have become so messed up that she tells me that she does not love me anymore and I should divorce her. I refuse everytime she tells me that, and she stopped having intercourse with me for almost 5 months now. Brothers and sisters I do not know what to do, if this is the work of Evil eye or Shaitan, I am panicked where I even find myself daydreaming sometimes. I love her and I love my son. Please help me out, I do not know what to do. I searched on google if there is any Quran/Dua to recite inorder to make things for the better good again. But the situation has become worse, that she even tells me to sleep at the couch everynight. What should I do? 

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PropellerAds

Assalami alaikum brother.

I think you should sit together and discuss it with an open mind. See what made her change, and if there is anything annoying her that you can fix.

But if she insists on divorce without any compromise or any wish to continue living with you, then you have to let her go, and seek another wife. This would be best for both of you. There is no reason that makes you live with someone that doesn't love you or wish to continue with you.

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"Obey my orders" .. :( talk back to you!!! For real do you want a wife and life partner or someone you can boss around? Maybe if you changed your wife would also change and you could prephaps enjoy a loving marriage of equals. Or is that not possible in Islam.

 

First off, talk to her, tell her you love her and do not want to lose her. Don't let your macho pride get in the way. Of course if you don't want to make the changes then you would be kinder to leave. Hope she and you could find happiness elsewhere.

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Husband and wife should live like friends. No doubt husband is a degree superior to wife but that does not make him her boss. Moreover, tolerance is the key solution to many problems. 

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 Sorry to hear of your predicament and can only offer the advice I have had to take myself. When the love is gone from a relationship for what ever reason, it usually means it is over. Difficult bit is to move on and keep things amicable for the sake of the children.

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Bro Zakaria, this seems like a complex problem, there is more than meets the eye.

 

Has there been any improvements so far, in your marriage? What steps have you taken?

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Solve the problem if possible and if its too complicated and both of you are not ready for a compromise, its better to get divorced. For handling the divorce process and settlements its always better to consult a good divorce lawyer. My friend had a similar situation and their case was handled by AlSaadi Advocates in Dubai. Divorce settlements and all was handled well by them. 

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