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Sister In Need Of Help

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I guess I start by saying that I love Islam and all that go with it but my life is upsetdown... I have stop going to prayer and stop wearing my veil.My family has not said anything about my behaviorat all I don't think they ever notice the different. I mean I don't think they care anymore. I stopped wearing my veil because of the looks and the people on the bus and at work just everyone. the sisters at prayer was no different. its just that i had no one to help me keep the faith in me anymore. but I never stop saying that I'm musilm Just stopped being Musilm I guess well i'm here today to seek help and maybe get some answers. to my Questions why is this so importion now because In a year I will be married and hopely starting a family. so this matters alot to me.



Any help and words will help me alot

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:sl: sister,


Always remember to ask Allah to help you. Don't ever think you are too far from Allah to request His help. Ask Allah to strengthen your iman and make the deen of Islam easy and enjoyable to you. And ask Him to guide you and to make you hate any other way of life.


When kuffar give you strangle looks because you wear the niqaab, don't let it stop you! Think about it! For every strange look you get, Allah is giving you loads of hasanaat (good deeds), or taking off loads of sayyi'aat (bad deeds).


And remember, Prophet Muhammad :sl: said:

“Islam began strange and will return to being strange as it was, so Tuba (a field of heaven) to the strangers.†(Muslim)


Doesn't it please you that the Lord above seven heavens is happy with your veil? Doesn't it make you smile to know that when you pray, you are conversing with your Creator? And He is replying to your dua and your requests? And He is pleased that His slave is prostrating to Him?


When a kaafir gives you a bad look, consider for a second who this guy is. It's some dirty kaafir who denies Allah as his Lord. This kaafir refuses to prostrate to Allah, and he is happy with that. He may even curse Allah and insult Prophet Muhammad :j:. He is jealous that you are wearing a hijaab and niqaab. Why? Because his wife, his sister, and his own mother are all pathetic. They go outside with very revealing clothes, and perfume that can be smelled from across the street, and enough make-up on that it covers their true face.

All this so they can get the attention of men. EVEN if he is walking with his wife, she is dressed this way. He sees other men looking at her and he gets angry but he never does anything because this is regular. He probably met his wife in a nightclub when they were both drunk.


In a few years, his daughter will be the same. He is angry with his failed life. He denies Allah and turns away from the beautiful deen of Islam, so Allah has made his life miserable. So he takes out his anger on the only respectable person he sees on the bus: you. He is used to a world of filth and disgusting sights, but when there is one respectable, honorable, dignified Muslim who only cares what her Lord thinks, not what kuffar think, all the kuffar stare and wonder what can drive a person to be so honorable? What causes these Muslims to live so honorably (when they truly follow their religion)?


Finally, try to find sisters such as yourself who have love for the deen of Allah, whom you can spend time with and be around. It's always good to be in good company who remind you of Allah every time you see them.


May Allah guide you and me and all our brothers and sisters.

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Peace daconcor,


You've pushed it too far, you are a Fascist by another name - if not in ideals then in spirit. If I called your mother pathetic, if I called you jealous of me when you are not, if I inferred that your parents got married because they were drunk, if I described your life as a failure merely because you hold a different view on the universe to me - then I had the sheer arrogance and lack of compassion to infer that only Muslims are 'honorable and dignifed' then I would surely know that I had struck rock bottom of the intellectual pile. (Not to even mention the irony.) I would hope that you'd be ashamed of what you're saying about your fellow human beings but I fear I expect to much of you. Every hate filled sentence you spout sets back all the patience and good manners of your fellow Muslims in explaining Islam to those who do not follow it, however to any non-Muslims reading this know that daconcor is a hate filled reject and does not represent the views of the overwhelming majority Muslims who are good and decent people.


To the lady who started this thread, I apologise for the angry outburst as this thread should be about your issue - not about hate. I'm a non-Muslim so I can't pretend to know what the religious scholars say on the veil. What I would say though is that it is not illegal for you to wear it, it's not illegal because it is your legal right to wear it if you want to. It's completely normal of you to feel self-conscious about wearing it if people staring are making you uncomfortable. (No doubt you know that already but I like stating the obvious.) So I guess it's sort of an internal battle you have between whether you want to fulfill a religious obligation (if that's how you see it) to wear the veil on the one hand and not wanting to feel like you stand out as an alien on the other. As I said earlier I can't give a religious argument in favour of wearing it, but I can give a social one. Daconcor thinks that people stare at you because non-Muslims are some sort of perverts that are just gagging to get a look at you, needless to say he's wrong. They stare at you because they're not used to seeing women wearing the veil and this in turn makes them feel uneasy, particularly because they're wary of what they call extremeism. If by wearing the veil you make them accustomed to seeing women wearing it, then future generations of Muslim women (such as the children you're ultimately hoping for) will not have to face the ordeal you have to on the bus or out shopping should they choose to wear the veil. In a way you could look at it as something of a duty to wear it for future generations, though it may be hard, for the betterment of tolerance in society.

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sister , you must know your enemy , the shaytan ( satan ) he right now is happy for what you have become, and Allah is testing you. dont fail the test sister .

now know your enemy and defeat him .


may Allah protect you sister .


Assalamu alaikum

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It's easy to say that you love Islam, but firstly; what is Islam? Islam is to submit yourself to The Creator. If you are not being obedient to Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, if you are not fulfilling your duties then you're not submitting yourself, rather you've strayed from the straight path. This is very serious sister and it is something which you need to address right now.


You mention that your family have not said anything to you about you not praying or wearing the hijab... I'm not sure what reason you would have to point that out to us - I can only assume that the reason you would mention something like that is because you feel your family (or parents) are the ones have control over your religion.. please forgive me, and correct me if I am wrong, but do you come from an asian cultural background?


For a muslim to give up praying... this doesn't happen over night - did something happen to you which made you distance yourself from Islam?


The problem could be that you never "knew" Islam in the first place. Alot of people are brought up with what they are told is Islam, but rather it is a twisted cultural version which infact is the opposite of Islam. The people who are brought up this way don't actually understand what Islam is really about... rather they just see it as something which they are told they must do... I think you mentioning your family gave that away. Islam isn't something you do to please your parents, Islam is between you and your Creator... yes you're parents definetly should have realised your situation and advised you - but it could be that your parents themselves aren't following Islam properly. I can't understand how your parents cannot see that you stopped wearing hijab... does your mum wear hijab? And when I ask whether she wears hijab, I mean properly (covering her hair fully) If not then my advice to you would be to learn Islam yourself, because you haven't been taught Islam correctly sister. One cannot just give up praying... this is something which distinguishes the believers from the non-believers.


Ask Allah Subanahu Wa Ta'ala to help you, because other than Allah you have no Helper.


You cannot get married in this state, because it will not be for the sake of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. If you want to get married, you must first learn the true Islam. You must read the Quran, and you must study the sunnah of The Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam and once you are fulfilling your obligations to your Lord then you can think about marriage. If you do not do this, if you do not come back to Islam, you will be of those who are the losers. If you want to have a bad marriage, ruin the lives of any children that you do have... and live a bad life in general, and worst than that a bad life in the hereafter then don't take the advice I have given you... this isn't even my advice - this is your DUTY as a MUSLIM. If you wish to please your Creator, and if you want to enter paradise (and I am sure you do) then please, take time to study Islam... you might find that there's alot which you haven't been taught. Islam is a complete way of life, I wouldn't want any other way of life.. it IS life. The reason we are on this earth is to worship our Creator, He has invited us to His Paradise - don't you want to enter His Paradise? ...you posting this shows that you want to please your Creator, you want to enter His Paradise.


You are strong, don't show weakness. So what if people give you weird looks? What... they are giving you weird looks because you are covering your beauty from them? These people find it acceptable to look at nakedness, they look at you weird because you're not showing yourself off like everyone else... they WANT you to uncover yourself. Sister, you can't give in to these people. The true believing MUSLIMS are your sincere advisers, if you give in to these people they will ruin you. If it was up to them they would have you completely naked... are these the people who you should imitate?


A Muslim and one who rejects his Creator are not the same - In fact, they are not worthy of even being called humans because as humans our whole purpose is to worship our Creator. They are not doing their jobs as humans therefore they are something else, and their kind are destined to the Fire. You posting here asking for help shows that you are different to them, but you must act now sister - that is my advice to you.


I ask Allah to forgive me for any wrong that I have said. May Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala guide us all.

Edited by Abu Firdaws

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