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Question About Marriage

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Assalamu Alaikium

 

Just wondering--According to Islam, can someone get married without parental permission? Like they want to get married for the sake of staying away from haram, but the parents will not allow it because they want them to finish university. Since when did marriage hindr education?!?! Just wondering. Jazakh'Allah!

 

Walikium Asalam

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Assalamu alaikum sister,

 

According to the 4 Madhabs a woman MUST have a wali (guardian) in order to get married. In most cases this is her father, unless he is unable to do so for some reason, or if he has passed away.

 

However, i understand that there is an opinion in the Hanafi school of thought that if by not allowing the marraige to go ahead, the couple will almost definately engage in some haram, ie Zina, then some (i emphasise only SOME) imams will carry out the http://http://nikah.com/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e without a wali.

 

The best advice would be to talk and talk with your parents and try to get them to see your point of view. You could even get your Imam to speak to them if he feels they are being unreasonable.

 

Wa'alaikumu salam

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:D

 

I think sis asmauk gave u the answer. but i was wondering why any parents will want that? what kind of obligation is that? first uni and then marriage..... its best if u talk to them, give them reasons that why its important to get married, and how waiting for long time could give shaitan a way to decieve u and lead u to the wrong way.

 

your wali doesn't have to be ur father, it can aslo be ur older brother or uncle.

Edited by Grace_of_Allah

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:D

 

Having said that marriage is quite a challenge and not something to be taken lightly or just to get away from present circumstances. More often than not, it leads to a whole new bunch of issues that may or may not be better than the conditions one has left to get married.

 

Just offering another spin on things :D Don't mean to question your judgement ..otherwise the above two have given u all the answers i think.

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Wa Alaykum salam

 

Hiding will not solve anything but leading in lying to your parents which can cause more debt in sin that wasn’t initially intended in the first place. It is very hard to find an imam willing to do the http://http://nikah.com/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e with the absent of wali and I advice the person not to fall into that trap…parents can be persuaded, they are not a brick which will not dense.

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I think sis asmauk gave u the answer. but i was wondering why any parents will want that? what kind of obligation is that? first uni and then marriage..... its best if u talk to them, give them reasons that why its important to get married, and how waiting for long time could give shaitan a way to decieve u and lead u to the wrong way.

 

your wali doesn't have to be ur father, it can aslo be ur older brother or uncle.

 

:D

 

Could you please provide the reference to that sister? JazakAllah khair.

 

:D

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Could you please provide the reference to that sister? JazakAllah khair.

 

:D

 

:D

 

Here's what i found :

Al-Tirmidhi said: This is the correct view concerning this issue, based on the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “There is no marriage without a wali (guardian),� according to the scholars among the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), such as ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab, ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib, ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Abbaas, Abu Hurayrah and others.

 

If one of your close male relatives is a Muslim, such as your father, brother, uncle or cousin, then he is your wali with regard to marriage, and your marriage is not valid without his permission and consent. He should do the marriage contract for you himself or appoint someone to do it on his behalf.

 

If all your close male relatives are non-Muslims, then a kaafir cannot be the wali (guardian) of a Muslim.

 

"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=48992&dgn=4"]Source[/url]

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:D

 

Could you please provide the reference to that sister? JazakAllah khair.

 

:D

 

 

:D

 

I think sis Ziggy provided u with that..... i said it because i have seen it happening many times whenever my cousins got married. some of my cousins made their brothers wali, some their uncles, some their fathers.

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:D

 

also check this sis Soulfulmujahada "you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_sunnipath(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/resources/Questions/qa00002558.aspx"]Secret Marriage[/url]

 

and "you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_sunnipath(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/resources/Questions/qa00002217.aspx"]Marriage without Guardian in Hanafi Madhab[/url]

Edited by Grace_of_Allah

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Here's what i found :

Al-Tirmidhi said: This is the correct view concerning this issue, based on the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “There is no marriage without a wali (guardian),� according to the scholars among the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), such as ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab, ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib, ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Abbaas, Abu Hurayrah and others.

 

If one of your close male relatives is a Muslim, such as your father, brother, uncle or cousin, then he is your wali with regard to marriage, and your marriage is not valid without his permission and consent. He should do the marriage contract for you himself or appoint someone to do it on his behalf.

 

If all your close male relatives are non-Muslims, then a kaafir cannot be the wali (guardian) of a Muslim.

 

"you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=48992&dgn=4"]Source[/url]

 

 

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah,

 

Uncle or brother can be wali only when the father is absent right? If the father is the wali, and he disapproves of a marriage, then neither the uncle nor the brother has the right to become the wali and marry her off. Is it correct?

 

:D

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:D

 

It doesn't say that anonymous.

 

It just says that either the father,brother, uncle or cousin must be present.

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:D

 

It doesn't say that anonymous.

 

It just says that either the father,brother, uncle or cousin must be present.

 

 

:D

 

I highly doubt that. So a girl can convince her brother, who has never been her guardian as the dad was always there.. and this brother can marry her off without the father's permission. That just doesnt sound right.

 

:D

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:D

 

There is an order, if the father is not there or able.

 

There are conditions to marrying wihtout a gaurdian, the groom has to be a "match" and "compatible", so things like education, intelligence and so on.

 

Best course of action would be to discuss with your parents first. It is ok to study while married, some can even manage with children aswell. Tell your parents to look for you, or inform others of you, as in some cultures the women wait to be approached with proposals and the men do the seeking.

 

:D

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Assalamu Alaikum Warahamtullahi Wabrakatahu,

 

Yes there is an order like it has been mentioned.

 

The Wali or Legal Guardian

 

The person who has the power or choice of getting a boy or girl married is called a wali

 

The first wali of a boy or girl is their father. If the father is not present, the grand-father becomes their wali. If he is not present, then the great grand-father. If none of them is present, the blood-brother becomes their wali. If he is not present, then the stepbrother, i.e. brothers from one father. Thereafter, the nephew, thereafter the nephew’s son; and thereafter, the nephew’s grandson. If none of them are present the blood uncle becomes wali. If he is not present, then the step uncle i.e. the step brother of their father. There after, the son of the blood uncle and thereafter his grandson. Thereafter, the son of the step-uncle and thereafter his grand-son, if none of hten are present, the fathers uncle, his children and grandchildren are not present; the the grand-fathers uncle becomes their wali. Thereafter, his children, grand-children, and great grand children.

If none of them are present, the mother will be their wali. Thereafter, the paternal grand-mother, then the maternal grand-mother and then the maternal grand-father. Thereafter, the blood-sister and then the step-sister, i.e. sisters from one father. Thereafter, the step-brother and hen the step-sister who is from one mother. Thereafter, the paternal aunt, then the maternal uncle, and then the maternal aunt.

 

The person must be sane, mature and Muslim.

 

Sorry, i dont remember the name of the source but I am sure this is correct, i hope its ok to post this, if it aint I can remove it. I think it was from a marriage book a reliable source.

 

I agree with Brother ahm that is the best course of action.

Insha'Allah your query has been resolved.

 

...

Edited by illuminate

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True...for some odd reason i didn't think of it that way anonymous :D

 

Thanx illuminate..that makes more sense.

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Assalamu Alaikum Warahamtullahi Wabrakatahu,

 

No problem Sister ziggy99, glad i could help.

 

...

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I think we are not able to solve this matter just by posting some answers from websites. its better if u ask someone knowledgable who can help u on this. one site will say one thing, the other might say something else as they follow different Madhabs. In Hanafi Madhab u can marry somone without the Guarian, as bro ahm said there are conditions for that.

 

here's one answer i also posted above, from Sunnipath.

 

In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,

 

It is certainly the sunna and proper way to get one’s guardian’s permission. The danger of going against one’s parents (in normal cases) is that it could well entail ‘being bad’ to one’s parents, which is one of the most serious of major sins.

 

According to the understanding of the Hanafi Madhhab, if a mature woman contracted her marriage without the approval of her guardian to someone who is considered legally suitable (kuf'u), then the marriage is valid.

 

However, if she is marrying someone that is not considered legally suitable or compatible, then this will need the approval of the father (or, in his absence, the nearest fit guardian). The relied-upon opinion is that in the absence of this approval from the guardian, a woman's marriage to a non-suitable man is not valid. If they live together, they are living together unlawfully. As such, if such situations come up, both parties must consult a scholar of recognized knowledge and taqwa for guidance, and to determine what their status is.

 

This has also been explained in many earlier posts.

 

And Allah knows best

Edited by Grace_of_Allah

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Marriage/you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_you can't post links until you reach 50 posts_nikah(contact admin if its a beneficial link)/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e/partner.php?adbanner=32t6k0e without a wali for the female is invalid - regardless if the Hanafi Madhab says its allowed or not - as this is what the Prophet (saw) told us - Nobody has overriding authority over the Prophet (saw) amongst mankind.

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